couch dolphin

1. (noun) A colloquial name for the Indo-Appalachian right-finned porpoise, usually found gesticulating betwixt couch cushions very racistly. Swims to the very far right and has a parasitic relationship with the “greatest” and whitest of sharks, when convenient.

2. (noun) A person who has intimate relations with an upholstered sitting apparatus, while they are watching p0rnpoise, because the concept of true human connection perplexes them.

Well… that Jim Dave Vance fellow turned out to be a real, self-described couch dolphin. Yikes. Is this why Cleveland had to get rid of Sea World?

by Judith Jetson Lightyear July 27, 2024

Loser Couch

A couch in which the losers at -insert video game you're playing here- are forced to sit while they wait to rejoin the next round of said game.

Lizzy, You are playing like you should be sitting on the loser couch with Blake!

by MoronicMaureen December 24, 2009

couch novel

someone who likes spending his/her time by reading novels while reclining on a couch!

jane(looking at jared who's sitting on a couch, reading 'The Ambler Warning'): gawd jared! You are such a couch novel!

by karait twirl April 7, 2009

two guys and a couch

Two guys who arent gay but blow eachother while doing a podcast on the couch

Thomas and Pete were two guys and a couch doing a podcast

by Stephchiohey October 1, 2017

Couching

The act of making love to a "big beautiful couch," otherwise known as a BBC.

"The other day I got caught couching by my mom."
"Bro the couch the couch was squeakier than Mickie mouse."

by RaT_DicK February 9, 2023

gives great couch

When a celebrity has an excellent conversation with a talk show host, particularly a late night talk show host.

Julia Roberts gives great couch on Stephen Colbert.

by Grace Noble December 29, 2023

Couching

Sitting on the couch being worthless. Often times accompanied by smoking weed and ordering delivery.

Alex was couching all day Sunday, when Meagehn tried to say she invented the word.

by Beanflicka14 August 6, 2017