Condom

what is proper etiquette to put on your lap at a dinner party

Everyone at the party placed the condom on their lap, as their mother taught them it was good etiquette from a young age

by SuccleMyToes November 7, 2017

windshield wiper condom

The bag people use to put on the rear windshield wiper before going through a car wash

Don’t forget to take of your windshield wiper condom after the car wash

by Beast.yeast November 23, 2017

Condom Conundrum

When you know that shit doesn’t feel the same with one, but you’ve slipped one past the goalie in the past and you can’t tell her the last time you got your shit tested so she’s super gay about it and makes you wear a condom.

"When was the last time you got tested?"
"No clue."
"And you're already a dad?"
"Yes."
"Looks like we go a condom conundrum on our hands here."

by Old Bae December 3, 2017

Coffee condom

The sleeve that goes on a steaming hot coffee (often from a drive thru) so you can hold it without burning your hand.

May I have a coffee condom for the cup to keep from burning my hands please?

by Momma D6 February 20, 2018

Condom

Something you use to have safe sex but won’t make sex fun

I used s condom during sec and it felt really boring

by Josuetherealidiot May 9, 2018

darth vader condom

A condom with darth vader on it and once slipped into the vagina the male will not be the father

Girl: have you got protection

Boy: I got that darth vader condom

Girl: YOU ARE NOT THE FATHER

by Daddy_piggy April 30, 2016

condom using

The act of placing(rolling) a latex or lamb skin apparatus down the shaft of the penis from the glans or head in which keeps semen in and disease out. 99.98% success of preventing pregnancy and imperative when not in a monogamous relationship for the safety it provides against diseases and unwanted pregnancies.

I am going out with that girl we met last week.

There will be some condom using after our date this evening.

by Thewoods September 15, 2016