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fresh off the boat

Used to announce the arrival of fresh, hot fried rice, usually just off a ship or cooking line. A way to signal something amazing, steamy, and worth dropping everything for.

Origin – The Chronicles of Steam and Salt (circa 603 CE)
Legend holds that during the reign of Emperor Gǔ Tán of the Jade Coast, the empire faced a culinary famine. The emperor, a devout lover of wok-fried rice, decreed that no grain of mediocre rice shall be served within the palace walls.

He summoned the Seven Rice Alchemists, legendary chefs who sailed eastward in gilded boats to find the perfect grain, seasoned wind, and wok flame. After three lunar cycles, they returned—bearing not just rare spices and golden grains, but vats of fried rice so fragrant, the emperor wept into his beard.

As the boats docked, steam rose like incense, and the people cried:

“Fresh off the boat!”
(“Rice from the boat, heaven’s aroma descends.”)

The phrase passed into legend, later used by dock workers, food smugglers, and ravenous poets whenever something too good to be local came in hot.

Fun Fact:
During a 1986 noodle festival in Macau, a fried rice vendor was fined for yelling “Fresh off the boat!” too many times during a single hour. It was later ruled a protected phrase by the Culinary Heritage Bureau.
“Yo, that smell?”
“Yeah, fried rice fresh off the boat. Get in line.”
by guy laughing June 7, 2025
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Get off my dick

Man 1: *harassing man 2*

Man 2: get off my dick
by JtkS!MP_3/RAD$ March 31, 2024
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jerk off in someone

Person 1: What did you do in the room?
Person 2: Jerk off in someone.
by Eggg1031 April 1, 2024
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stall off

stall off
Steps are being made to stall off the identification and avoid the media frensy when the news gets out.
by Spyph April 6, 2024
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jacking off a trans man

you expect to take a man with a 9 inch dick home instead you bring home a tranny.
Example: Last night I was caught by my mother jacking off a trans man!
by TheLaughingJackass April 8, 2024
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A Jerk-Off Jehova Witness

noun: person: A Jerk-off Jehova Witness is somebody who only texts or calls you when he's jerking off, and doesn't ever want to actually meet. He is annoying and comes a-knocking at the times that are convenient only to them.
Mike only ever calls me when he's jerking off. I offer to make plans so we can both get off, but something always comes up. He's such a jerk-off jehova. aka. a Jerk-Off Jehova Witness
by R. Tizz-E April 9, 2024
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take the crust off my bread

When you cut the edges of your dollar bill off.
Does add a discount of 20% off your electricity bills if you've a lot of crustless bread.
Friend: "You have a good day?"
Me: "No, I had to take the crust off my bread :((("
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