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Emotionally Active Young Teenage Woman

A euphemism for when AUNT FLO comes to visit. You might use this to describe someone for whom the RED SEA HAS PARTED. Someone with a RED BADGE OF COURAGE who cries an ocean when Carl Wheezer gets rejected by his favorite llama.
I can’t hang with you, Becky; I’m an Emotionally Active Young Teenage Woman again.

Bobby Hill: Emotionally Active Young Teenage Women always scream at me when I make jokes.
Adolf Hitler: Jokes about the RED BARON crossing the English Channel?
Carl Wheezer: No dude. Any. Joke.
George Costanza: We live in a society

Hello, Tampax? We need another shipment for our store because we’ve just been hit by a monthly stampede of emotionally active young teenage women.
by Raul Pudd August 2, 2024
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emotional microwave popcorn friend

This is your friend that you can contact when you are upset who is quick to help support you and be there for you, but ultimately what support they provide does not last and it is not all that healthy anyway. You will lean on this person whenever you can despite knowing they are not really all that helpful.
Gabriel was upset over Lola - AGAIN! He text Lisbeth and soon they were speaking. He poured out his heart. She listened and helped soothe his dispirited soul. Unfortunately, Lisbeth was his emotional microwave popcorn friend. An hour after they spoke he was heartbroken again. He made some microwave popcorn and wept into the bowl watching Baywatch.
by von groovy August 4, 2024
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Emotional Tampon

A person who listens to all the problems in a relationship from someone (usually a friend) who refuses to bring up the issue with their significant other.
"Dude, break up with your boyfriend, I'm tired of being your Emotional Tampon!"
by Edwina rose February 17, 2024
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emotional hoarder

Someone who collects compromising anecdotes and personal Achilles' heel tales from friends and acquaintances for boosting his or her own morale and for possible weaponizing at some critical later date.
Don't kid yourself about Carol being a good listener. She's an emotional hoarder, and anything you told her while you were inebriated at that party will eventually come back to haunt you.
by Rich Hersh February 27, 2024
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emotional martyr

A person or being who will infiltrate your personal life like a terrorist. attack emotionally , ultimately attach and thrive off any validation. Which they are seeking. Finally, knowingly implode taking you along with them.
Diana grew up brainwashed. Her terroristic tendencies allowed her to cross paths with Brad Litt. Unknowingly he was her next victim and she was to be his emotional martyr. She is always the victim, truly.
by Beachareyouokay March 17, 2024
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Emotional support insomnia

Enjoying the late night instead of sleeping. Staying up much later than is smart or practical in order to claw back a sense of self and autonomy. Anti capitalist insomnia.
My emotional support insomnia kept me up until 4am reading fanfic. I’m so tired but it was totally worth it.
by One Twisted Miracle April 7, 2024
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Emotional Landmine

An Emotional Landmine is someone with unpredictable, turbulent emotions, and/or unexpected and extreme reactions to seemingly benign conversation. Emotional Landmines tend to hide their boundaries until you cross them, and seek revenge for the unintentional slight. Some Emotional Landmines may ghost close friends for setting them off, without even telling them that they've done anything wrong.

Some people on the autism spectrum see allistic (allistic means "not autistic") people as Emotional Landmines, and vice-versa. It's important to remember that the neurotype barrier is not a flaw with the other neurotype, but a "it's six/no it's nine" situation, neurologically. Some things that upset allistic people are totally fine and normal to autistic people, and some things that upset autistic people are totally fine and normal to allistic people.

Neither are wrong; it's important to recognize these differences, and acknowledge that other people may not know how you feel. This is not a lack of empathy, but rather, a lack of understanding. If they knew how you felt and why, they'd likely be supportive. Please be patient with people, especially strangers.

Please don't be an Emotional Landmine. Anyone can be one, especially under immense stress, so please be mindful of other peoples' perspectives.
Use in sentence:
"Hey, what happened with Andy the other day? He stormed off like he was pissed."
"I have no idea, man. I asked him how pizza night went, and all of a sudden he blew up in my face like I offended his ancestors."
"Sounds like he's an emotional landmine. Maybe be more careful around him."

Example 1:
"Hey Greg, how's the wife?"
"She died last week, you jackass."
"Woah! I had no idea, I'm so sorry!"
"It's too late for sorry! You should know better!" <-- Emotional Landmine

Example 2:
"Hey dude, how's it going?"
"Not great, my dog is missing and I'm super worried. Last time this happened with my other dog, we had to cremate. How about you?"
"Awful, now that you just trauma dumped on me. Why did you start the conversation like that?"
"Because you asked how I was doing???"
"You're supposed to just say 'yeah I'm fine' like everyone else. Dude, screw off." <-- Emotional Landmine
by Majestical Discomfort May 7, 2024
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