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straight for Jesus

A very Christian man that has chosen to ignore his natural instincts and try to make a life with a female because of his belief that homosexuality is wrong.
Scott is straight for Jesus. He clearly is gay and checks me out all the time.
by Christopher J. Smith September 1, 2007
mugGet the straight for Jesusmug.

slim jesus

how to be slim jesus
>be white
>watch Straight out of Compton
>capture mexican kid
>make drill rap
by lolitsalex December 27, 2015
mugGet the slim jesusmug.

Battle-Jesus

Battle-Jesus is the modernized savior from old. This version of Jesus tots a handgun, and tots an Uzi. Instead of the peaceful all-loving savior we are used to knowing, Battle-Jesus faces you with fire and brimestone. Destroying the sinners, and cleansing the world of all evil. This meaning that only hippies will be left, because they just sit around and smoke dope, and love the trees. And the bible aint saying nothin bout tree-sex.

Though, there have been, of course, varied versions of Battle-Jesus made throughout the course of history. Most notabley, a GI Joe Jesus figure.
Battle-Jesus!
Battle-Jesus is here.
Battle-Jesus!
Sinners cower in fear.
Battle-Jesus!
Armageddon on your Doorstep.
Battle-Jesus!
Death 'til only hippies are left.
Battle-Jesus!
by Battle-Jesus February 3, 2007
mugGet the Battle-Jesusmug.

Potato Jesus

It is believed that Jesus is a potato. He infact was not human like the bible sugests. Pages were ripped out of the original bible with all of the information and proof that Jesus was a potato. They have been recovered and the pages are believed to be Salt and Vinegar flavoured.

God knew that potato's were a superior species to humans and a perfect vessel for our savior. The human that claimed he was jesus was nailed to a cross for his stupid ideas, the real jesus "Potato Jesus" revived fake jesus being sympathetic to the pathetic human.

Potato Jesus' whereabouts are unknown but philosophers believe he built a Spud bag mothership and ventured onward to the world ruled by potatos and where humans are grown in the ground.
Jesus was a human

No Jesus is a potato. In fact he is Potato Jesus.
by ScurryInertia September 27, 2005
mugGet the Potato Jesusmug.

jesus phone

slang term used for an iPhone
My $600 jesus phone fell out of my pocket.
by Junpei August 3, 2007
mugGet the jesus phonemug.

Jesus Ham

The saviour of low-budget, processed meat. Coming soon to a supermarket near you!
Jesus Ham: It's Christ-tastic!
by Biddy March 12, 2005
mugGet the Jesus Hammug.

Jesus Piss

A term that has no meaning, but is used commonly in a state of anger and frustration. Also has nothing to with Religious beliefs.
"Jesus Piss! Where did that guy come from?"
by The Occational Flame. May 15, 2010
mugGet the Jesus Pissmug.

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