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Bastardised English 

What Americans speak.

It probably pisses you guys off that the rest of the world hates you, but seeing as you only just found out that there actually IS a rest of the world (shock horror) and you barely know who they are, why does it matter, eh?
1. It's fucking JAG-YOU-ARE, not JAG-WAR. The brand is from fucking Britain. It's pronounced however the British pronounce it.

2. America has come pretty far, I think they sent a bloke to space in the 60s or something and have caused one hell of a lot of global warming. So you're right there.

3. Americans do have better oral hygiene, so you're right there too. You can be safe in that knowledge when you're driving around in your fucking stupid pickup truck with a unnecessarily big 7 litre V8 under the bonnet which uses more petrol to go 2 metres than the average British car uses to go 50 miles. The example has to include Bastardised English, so there it is.

British English 

Gee, Dwayne, did you done heared them Limeys a-speakin' of with they British English jibber-jabber? Ah near falled out of mah trailer.

fractured english 

What nerds use as a second language whilist talking online to various ethnic groups and social denominations. The use of this language helps the speaker communicate in such away that all who are talked to (whether they be petephiles or 12 year old asians) can understand the language.
EX. Fractured English
<squiggy>So liek what r u guyz up to.
<petephile>nm u?
<12 year old asian> i like warcraft.

carl english 

a person who is a quite dosy and tends to be quite funny and who is also a sheffield wednesday supporter.
e.g. 'how can you be such a carl english and support that team!'.
carl english by alan d. July 26, 2006

body english 

In sports, the movements or signs (usually unconscious) that indicate what a player is about to do.
The pitcher's arms tensed, his shoulders rose, and his weight shifted to his right foot. His body english was signaling a fastball.
body english by SmileyScout June 10, 2008

american english

american english is just another way of saying bastardized english.
americans dont know how to talk. i should know, because im american.

American English

American English is a language that has so many obvious rules that almost only Americans break.
the difference between "then" and "than". they almost always confuse them. I'm not American but I perfectly know when to use each one!
American English by Pan March 3, 2007