shitistics

The mathematical process by which one or a group measures the quality and size of their shits. A way to compare shits between competing friends/enemies. There is an average shit for humanity, as taken by Jesus Christ unto St. Peter's face (the Holy Shit), and shits greater than or less than the Holy Shit is measured by standard deviation in terms of chippermonkeys. Shitistics apply to size, girth, smell, denisty, color, and toilet clogging ability. Shitistics are measured by a neutral arbiter in a "who took the biggest shit" dispute.

Jason: Shit dude, I took a huge shit this morning.

Matt: What are the shitistics you shithead?

Jason: Size: 1.2 chippermonkeys, Girth: 3.8 chippermonkeys, Smell: 2.8 chippermonkeys, Density: -1.9 chippermonkeys, Color: 0.2 chippermonkeys, Toilet Clogging: 10.0 chippermonkeys.

Matt: I guess thats a decent shit.

Jason: Shit, I had to buy new socks.

Matt: Tell Craig to come measure the shitistics on the deuce I just dropped.

by Cream Puff69 October 13, 2012

Shitlist

people who piss you off.
People who abuse their powers/authority

I hate thaT fucking BITCH , they are going on my shit list

by Ur moma February 25, 2004

Shitties

First said by the infamous dick. Well known in Southern Ontario. The informal and cute way of saying shit. Otherwise known as the plural form of shit.

Awwe SHITTIES!!

by Sdawgsarehot November 21, 2011

shitnest

a tech start up that manages to survive despite having a bad business idea and substandard executive leadership. First used by an unnamed recruiter to describe an unnamed company. Ultimately it is a place that you would not want to work!

Recruiter: "where are you working now"
Candidate: "XYZ Company"
Recruiter: "that place is a shitnest"

by llewdib October 14, 2011

Shitchester

A town where uncultured people think they're educated but they know jack-all. The majority of the population of Shitchester don't seem to realise that there's a whole world outside for them to explore and thus they normally stay in their little town producing kids JUST after the moment they hit puberty.

See Chichester

Also known as Chichester Shitchester

by Zay-J July 24, 2012

Pissy shitties

A disgusting fictional concoction of soda and movie theater popcorn that no sane human would ever ingest and was made up purely for shock value. Its name doesn't make any sense and people are tired of it being constantly mentioned in food based facebook groups.

"Hey have you heard of pissy shitties? They're--"
'No, fuck you, shut up, stop talking, go away.'

by Tired of old shitposts July 5, 2020

shitfister

One who fists in the ass, especially after ones partner has not wiped after a shit

That Underwood is a real shitfister

by gek of Arabia October 9, 2004