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Cant Touch Grass Syndrome 

When a person hasn't been outside to touch grass in more than 2 weeks, then u have Can't Touch Grass Syndrome, where they're officially lost to League of Legends
"Bruh i havent been outside for 2 months ,i probly have Cant Touch Grass Syndrome"John Snow
"Oh ,that checks out,u have been inside alot,u look like a vampire,cause i havent been outside for years" Princess Bubblegum
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I cant read 

You : I cant read
Me : Yes you can
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the center for kids who cant read good and want to learn how to do other stuff good too 

a place to help kids

owned by: Derek Zoolander
MUGATU: i present to you... THE DEREK ZOOLANDER CENTER FOR KIDS WHO CAN'T READ GOOD! (unveils a model of the center for kids who cant read good and want to learn how to do other stuff good too)

DEREK: ..what is this?! a center for ants?!?! how can we be expected to teach children how to read if they can't even fit inside the building?!

i cant even right now 

When fangirls cant right now they cant breathe or do anything they are in happy shock
Fangirl1:Did you see Dan's new video

Fangirl 2:YES AND I CANT EVEN RIGHT NOW

Jesus cant spell 

A fat lard mexican headass that cant spell and shoves shit up uis ass
Me:Yo jesus cant spell , you're a faggot
Jesus cant spell: goddamnit
Jesus cant spell by Asscheecks January 14, 2019

why cant i write a definition 

wtf why cant i write a definition i had to write htat out becuase it wouldnet let me submit ot othewise
A saying that means "i cannot handle this" or, "wow". A saying that shows disblelief.
girl 1 "that skinny girl was all like 'omg im so fat' "
girl 2 " (rolls eyes) i cant"

example 2
jan "did you see her facebook status? she wrote about how she's so hot and everyone wants her"
karen "ugh i cant bro"
i cant by ican December 10, 2010