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Alaskan Advent Calendar

The act of jizzing in one hole of an advent calendar every day until there are no more left. Then you freeze it overnight and then eat the chocolates. When you have all of chocolates in your mouth, you have oral sex with your bitch and then shoot her with a massive load of cum, and when she is knocked out from the cum, you throwing her out the window onto a freeway.
I gave my bitch and Alaskan Advent Calendar and the funeral is next thursday.
by 6117 March 11, 2025
mugGet the Alaskan Advent Calendarmug.

Calendar

How about bring out a calendar.
Hey Urbie how about create a calendar.
Yeah I'd buy one!
by Don't you know who I am December 8, 2023
mugGet the Calendarmug.

Tinder Advent Calendar

Swiping psychotically through Tinder after dinner each night of the holidays to kill time and ensure matches.

Alone in quarantine or bored stiff on their parents' couch, young singles everywhere swipe to the end of their daily allowance, reaping a heinous daily match with a past-prime hometown hottie, or the waiter from the cafe downstairs you've never seen with his mask off. Tinder Advent Calendar matches offer all the short-lived indulgence of the advent chocolates of childhood, but with the added risk of a dick pic.
Harriet's Tinder Advent Calendar currently features Abs Joe from Chem, now a year-round receptionist, and Cute Window Guy who makes ugly infographics on his Instagram.
by daltonjfk December 17, 2020
mugGet the Tinder Advent Calendarmug.

Jackson Calendar

A calendar that completely skips over July 1st and has June 32nd instead to avoid failing No Jerk July on the first day
Maddox failed bro he had to use the Jackson Calendar
by TheStupendousOne July 2, 2025
mugGet the Jackson Calendarmug.

Jackson Calendar

A calendar that includes June 31st instead of July 1st and goes straight to July 2nd just in case you failed No Jerk July on the first day like Jackson
That freaking gooner had to use the Jackson Calendar
by TheStupendousOne July 2, 2025
mugGet the Jackson Calendarmug.

Alternative NNN Calendar

Jack-off January
Fuck-time February
Masturbating March
Anal April
Moaning May
Jizzing June
Juicy July
Ate-out August
Sucking September
Ovulating October
Nutting November
Dick-riding December
I am participating in Ate-out August instead of No Nut November this year.

Yo bro, you trying the Alternative NNN Calendar this year?
Of course bro, i am always up for a challenge.
by Delays April 15, 2024
mugGet the Alternative NNN Calendarmug.

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