upholstery

Slang for the hair on a woman's upper legs, stomach, and back.

Guy to a red haired girl: So, does the carpet match the drapes?
Red haired girl: Yeah. But not the upholstery.

(Thanks xkcd!)

by Tanaka Mushi April 4, 2009

upholstery

Slang/meme for Armpit hair

Started by xkcd

I'd prefer a girl with ZERO upholstery

by annhltr April 4, 2009

palate for upholstery

When you have a particular fondness of the taste of carpet in your mouth, also known as a rug muncher or a lesbian.

Wow, look at that girl with the short spikey hair, she definitely has a palate for upholstery

by juleybee December 14, 2010

upholstery orphans

the loads of baby batter that drip down your crack and leaves stains on your upholstery

Bitch, look at all the upholstery orphans on the couch, you shoulda taken that shit to the bathroom for a porcelain abortion for real!

by squeak69 November 28, 2009

upHOLSTERy

Da plush lining on a fancy waistband-worn firearm-holder.

Hot chick: Da first time my new guy took me to see his house, he also showed me his collection of gleaming six-shooters and deluxe upHOLSTERy-lined pistol-packing sleeves, then fitted me with safety-goggles and earmuffs, and helped me to participate in an impromptu target-practice party with his buddies.

by QuacksO August 16, 2025

upholstery demon

When someone passes gas on your couch that's so foul when the person leaves the smell stays in the upholstery

Dude, why the hell does your apartment smell so bad?

Because Larry came over last night and left an upholstery demon...

by Upholstery Demon March 25, 2019

Upholstery Day

The day when you become Upholstered. This can occur on any day. This day makes you very special because it is a rare occurrence that was developed in the year 1895. Recently it has spiked in popularity.

Drew was upholstered on Upholstery Day.

by Gerald Tical June 6, 2022