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pistachioed

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To fuck a girl so hard you leave her quim chafed and red to where it resembles a pistachio.
I pistachioed the ole lady's snooch real good last night.
by wolfbait51 May 31, 2011
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A non-life-threatening, but common and annoying syndrome brought on by frequent use of thumb nails to crack open pistachios; Symptoms include but are not limited to, aching of the thumbs; fissures or punctures found on the thumbs; thumb nails cracked, broken and ALWAYS much shorter than other finger nails. The only cures developed are cursing like a sailor in short bursts, shelled pistachios, the use of implanted squirrel teeth, or completely discontinuing the fabulous, salty roasted nut, however, most serious pistachio consumers would rather live with the syndrome.
Bitch be needing a mani...PTS ( Pistachio Thumb Syndrome ) in full effect...
by CUNDSNO December 15, 2012
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pistachio

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To refer to a member of the opposite sex in conversation when such discussion may be considered overly discriminatory or sexist when being overheard. Can refer to the USDA system of grading for pistachio nuts and shells (i.e. U.S. Fancy, U.S. Extra No. 1, U.S. No. 1, and U.S. Select).
"Check out the pistachio by the doorway. Extra No. 1 grade."
"Agreed."
by shabazzier January 5, 2017
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pistachio pudding

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When your sick girlfriend hawks a loogie after you cum in her mouth.
Tamara was sick, so I came in her mouth and she made pistachio pudding
by Superlance1 November 28, 2013
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Refers to a disease a person gets when their stash dries up.
After smoking all her weed that weekend Ally had pistachiosis (pis-ta-she-o-sis).
by McNeal February 4, 2008
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Pistachio Friend

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Lifestyle friends that you don't necessarily have sex with. They may have been vanilla friends first or lifestyle friends that enjoy each other's company, but are not sexually attracted to each other or don't want to have sex with each other for some reason
They are more than my vanilla friends, but not my chocolate friends; they are pistachio friends.
by Bikamasutracouple January 20, 2019
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Pistachiownage

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N: The act of kicking someone in the nuts.
NED: I just got kicked in the nuts...
ED: Oh no - that's pistachiownage!
by Znoosle June 21, 2006
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