A regular average Californian male. Laid back and
chill, this mildly common creature can often appear high to those who
don't know otherwise. Though kind and always available, this species is highly deflective. Usually, Matthews only share their true feelings with a soul mate. Very often, these creatures will also become particularly attached to certain words. The words vary greatly, ranging from sexual to biscuits to
Britney Spears. Though mostly comprised of these positive features, Matthews can develop extremely douchebag-like tendencies, often resulting in womanizing. After extended periods of this behavior, Matthews will often go into a state of
depression and likely distance themselves from loved ones. These states of
depression can cause substance abuse, alcoholism, and cutting in extreme cases. Also, a Matthews trust is difficult to gain and very easy to lose, so caution is advised. Despite all of these major flaws, Matthews remain fun and spontaneous to be around (provided they trust you), and they will always lend a helping hand.
"My friend ditched his girlfriend to drive me to my cousin's funeral today."
"
Wow. He's a total Matthew."
"Oh my gosh. My
brother was talking about how he'd run out of virgin ass at his school today."
"Your
brother is such a jerky Matthew."
"I really like this guy, but he won't open up to me."
"He's a Matthew. It just takes time."