absense 

The state of articulating nonsense.

The advantage of using this word is that most people will assume that you are misspelling the word "absence", but you will secretly know what you really meant. And it will be your hope that, subconsciously, they do too.

In Ray's absense, I will present the information.

absense by office_instigator September 24, 2016

gamer absence

big men fucking

"I just did a gamer absence"
"ok"

gamer absence by fortnitefunny November 3, 2019

Absentee Printing 

The much maligned practice of printing eleventy billion pages in a busy computer lab and then leaving them unattended on a laser printer's paper tray for long periods of time. Absentee printers often confuse and annoy their fellow computer lab patrons as their excessive printing quickly buries the print jobs of other lab patrons.

This practice often forces harried college students to waste precious time sifting through dozens of pages of random senior theses, flyers, newsletters, and other miscellaneous crap in order to find their term papers, tragically thwarting last minute attempts to finish and print homework 5 minutes before class starts.

Chronic absentee printers often sit blissfully at their computers browsing Facebook for extremely long periods of time before retrieving their documents.

Absentee printing is endemic to college computer labs the world over.

Bob stormed in late to his philosopy class because his essay got caught up in the fray of absentee printing.

Jane stood hovering over the printer for five minutes as he waited for the 100 page print job of an anonymous absentee printer to hopelessly spew out of the printer.

Absentee Printing by iNetter December 1, 2009

Strategic Absence 

Noun

When you skip school on a day you have a really big assignment due, such as a project or a report. Can also apply to exams. Very common in high school and secondary school

Dude, the project's due tomorrow, are you done? No man, I'm gonna pull a strategic absence tomorrow to save my ass

Strategic Absence by dachyr May 2, 2010

Absenteecrown3 

Professional minecraft controller player
Very popular for being good on 60fps

Omg its absenteecrown3. He is so hard to beat at minecraft

Absenteecrown3 by LemonTurtle4 March 13, 2021

AdSense 

A division of Google, and nothing else but a bunch of thieves. They offer to advertise on your site, and give you a share of mulah, letting your money build up. Then at the apex of your financial glory, they disable your account and "refund your money to the affected advertisers." AKA, you get jewed. Typically, they send you an e-mail with a bullshit reason saying your account is generating a risk of invalid activity, which may "financially hurt" advertisers (as though it will even scratch their surfaces). Google even has the nerve to say "thank you for your patience and understanding". Users are typically offered appeal forms, however, at the risk of not getting reinstated (or reinstated, then cancelled again) it isn't usually worth it.

Some people who have been shut down by AdSense have lost upwards of $3,000. Don't believe me? Then Google NCC Archives 219 and see what these happy people had to say.

AdSense by IsraelHands09 November 30, 2011

absence of shower syndrome 

A disease usually refering to a person who smells like a skunked beer, combined with body odor, fishy pubic hair, and dried anal seapage displaying a general lack of hygiene that would otherwise make a radius of 25 feet from the person inpalatable.

Bob the Hobo + Your Mom + Your Nasty French Teacher + Britney Spears= A.S.S.

Man you smell like ass
I know I have Absence of Shower syndrome

absence of shower syndrome by krikeymynipple April 7, 2010