IsraelHands09's definitions

Mystery Blinker

The act of pushing your car's turn signal stick up and down in sync with the actual tempo of your car's turn signal. (Troll effect best achieved in multi-directional turn lanes and middle lanes of highways.)

Some A-hole pulled the mystery blinker, then just merged right in front of me.

by IsraelHands09 December 24, 2010

Engineer

Someone who solves a problem you didn't know you had in a way you don't understand.

You: "Hey, wait here, I'mma go take a dump."

Friend: "Alright."

*5 minutes later*

Friend: "Dude..I was playing guitar with your amp and I noticed a parasitic capacitance between the output and the input, causing parasitic oscillation. So I really quickly soldered them a little further from eachother, so it shouldn't have any feedback anymore."

You: "Oh...uhhh... thanks?"

Friend: "Hey, I'm an engineer. It's what I do."

by IsraelHands09 September 18, 2010

Fapsock

The one unwanted unworn pear of crusty jizz soaked feet-warmers found on the floor next to your computer's chassis. Used generally for emergency fap purposes when the girl's at work or too tired, or when you're single.

Hmm can't find any dish scrubbers. Guess I'll just use my fapsock to scrub the iron skillet.

by IsraelHands09 January 26, 2011

Prossy

Short for "Processor" which is essentially the brain of any computing device. Two major processor developers are AMD and Intel.

My stupid ass motherboard died today, so I got to get a new motherboard, which will also require me to purchase another prossy.

by IsraelHands09 November 11, 2010

WTFUD

Acronym for "What The Fuck, Urban Dictionary?" Describes the question many find themselves asking when they see a UD: Word Of The Day that is utterly humorless and boring, and you proceed to wonder why they rejected some of your best chuckle-inducing past submissions to the complete piece of shit you just wasted precious eye energy reading.

"Ohhh, look a new word of the day!"

Word: TRDMC - Tears Running Down My Cheek acronym. Used when something so funny is messaged to you, that you are in tears from laughing so hard.

"...WTFUD? How is that shit even funny? My definition I posted the other day would've been so much better."

by IsraelHands09 September 9, 2011

Sylvester Stallone

Mokuhl Sylvustha Gahdenziuh Stuhlorn; famoos actner, directah, fimmaker an shit. He muh rehne mooha bawonuh mewa moo meh. Mos renun for his rowe ehmana movies Rommy Barboa an Juhn Rambo

Did you see the movie "The Expendables?" It had Sylvester Stallone in it!

God, I can barely understand Sylvester Stallone when he talks, it's like trying to hear a New Yorker talk with an uncooked potato shoved in his massive mouth.

Interviewer: "So Mr. Stallone, what do you like doing in your free time?"

Sylvester: "Wehl, when ah roowy wink amun it, I foon marself moha junoso munuh, mespooshally quantum biomechanics".

by IsraelHands09 September 10, 2011

AdSense

A division of Google, and nothing else but a bunch of thieves. They offer to advertise on your site, and give you a share of mulah, letting your money build up. Then at the apex of your financial glory, they disable your account and "refund your money to the affected advertisers." AKA, you get jewed. Typically, they send you an e-mail with a bullshit reason saying your account is generating a risk of invalid activity, which may "financially hurt" advertisers (as though it will even scratch their surfaces). Google even has the nerve to say "thank you for your patience and understanding". Users are typically offered appeal forms, however, at the risk of not getting reinstated (or reinstated, then cancelled again) it isn't usually worth it.

Some people who have been shut down by AdSense have lost upwards of $3,000. Don't believe me? Then Google NCC Archives 219 and see what these happy people had to say.

by IsraelHands09 November 30, 2011