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Cardenesque 

Clumsy, shortsighted approach to all aspects of life. Examples of cardenesque behaviour may involved awkwardness in social situations, such as offering strangers small drinks or taking great offence at inanimate objects' presence.

Cardenesque behaviour is often associated with alcoholism, followed by an almost schizophrenic style of conversation where deep-rooted insults are followed immediately by profuse apologies and public displays of affection.

The results of sustained periods of such behaviour can be as minor as creating and repeatedly singing a personal theme-tune to far more sinister acts resulting in defecation or serious personal injury.
Examples of cardenesque conversations

A: "Might I buy you a SMALL glass of red wine?"

B: No

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A: "You're a cunt. I fucking hate you."

A: "I'm sorry I really love you I mean. Give me a kiss"
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Careedy Story 

A story which is communicated with such descriptive enthusiasm and gusto, along with expressive flailing of limbs, that the listener cannot help but stand transfixed in anticipation of the ensuing delails.
Unfortunately, not enough space is provided for an accurate representation of a Careedy Story. Sorry.
Careedy Story by HossBoss April 25, 2007

Cardello's Butthole

The proposition which stiplulates that there must be another world buttfucking, asslicking, and fingering which is a separate world from the one we have.
I have seen proofs of Cardello's Butthole all around, and they are totally griggidy.

Carpedonktum 

The handle (gamer/hacker/online identity) of a conservative online personality and meme creator, found on Facebook, Instagram, & Youtube, among others.
Did you hear that pro trump supporter Carpedonktum's Twitter account got taken down last week?
Carpedonktum by Louie Arden September 21, 2020
Steve: Holy shit that dude just got Carled!!!
Gabe: What a fucking pussy.
Carled by Oral Hershizer October 30, 2006

cardadoodle 

A sexy cardboard dog
Ooh look at that hot cardadoodle
A short term to express the phrase “I really don’t care.” When the other person said something rude or unwarranted, you say “cared” to show that what they said means nothing to you and is honestly purposeless.
Adam: “I’m sorry babe I can’t pick you up from work anymore, i’m too lazy.”
Lisa: “Cared adam. You don’t ever show you care about me.”
Cared by cheymed April 3, 2019