Skip to main content

the deep is calling 

You went insane after playing deepwoken too long.
THE DEEP IS CALLING THE DEEP IS CALLING THE DEEP IS CALLING

The Dunny Is Calling

The message one gets when you have a massive attack of the shits.

That is when you hear that The Dunny Is Calling.
"The Dunny is calling me."

What do you say when the cops come calling? 

I mean... If the send officer sexy then...
Hym "Sit on my face please? Ma'am- Er, uh- Officer? Can I request my last meal early? No? I'll confess immediately if you let me hit it from the back? You got me! I was conspiring to murder that pussy, baby! I'M GONNA SHOOT!!! My load in you...? What DO you say when the cops come calling? I mean, you know what they say: The cops can't come calling if you're coming in a cop! Uum... Do I fill out the paperwork BEFORE or AFTER I fill you... Out? Up? I donno... But yeah, one of those ☝️

Calling Jesus on the porcelain telephone 

The act of clinging to a toilet basin throwing up violently after a heavy night of binge drinking.

So named after the fashion of sticking your head into the bowl and shouting the name of our Lord between spasms.
BLEURGH!!! Oh Jesus, BLEEEHHRRRK!!! Oh Lord, BLOOOORGH!!!! Aw Christ, HUUUUUEEEEEEERRRRGH!!!!! etc

<<Seven Thousand Nine Hundred And Seventy Six>>Calling The Cops On Me On Cops The Calling<<Seven Thousand Nine Hundred And Seventy Six>>

<<Seven Thousand Nine Hundred And Seventy Six>>Calling The Cops On Me On Cops The Calling<<Seven Thousand Nine Hundred And Seventy Six>>
<<Seven Thousand Nine Hundred And Seventy Six>>Calling The Cops On Me On Cops The Calling<<Seven Thousand Nine Hundred And Seventy Six>>

the calming dutchman 

While searching for potential mates you aquire chloroform and forceably persuade a woman and or man into your creeper van making sure that they cannot identify you. Once they wake up they are in a cell in a basement where you price we to "rescue them". They will be so grateful that they will instantly fall in love with you allowing you to have them live with you and they are eternally grateful. However the love scene doesnt last long before you pose as someone else and kidnap them all over again. Then you rescue them again. Convincing them every time to go further into your fantasies. Until one night or day where its time to provide an end to the illusion. So while they are tied up, gagged, with pepto bismol all over them with the tens unit hooked up to their privates and 15 dildos poked in all their holes you decide to reveal to them that you are the perpetrator who keeps kidnapping them. Then while they are freaking out you seek out to calm them while fucking their asshole. If they do not call down after a few minutes you cut their throats and fuck them while they bleed out. They finally calm down after they are exsanguinated and you finish what you were doing.
The calming dutchman is definitely on my bucket list.