we're not here to shag spiders 

Australian expression meaning "we're not here to fuck around", "Get your arse in gear", "get a move on", "let's get on with it", etc

Usually required when someone is Dragging the Chain and making the rest of the group wait until they're done fucking around.

Has the added bonus of shock value, if used in the right (inappropriate) company.

Come on mate, get your arse into gear, we're not here to shag spiders!

we're not here to shag spiders by AussieCol September 22, 2017

Mrs. Spiders 

A demon. There's no other way of putting it. Her favorite saying is "NO FUN ALLOWED!" and she doesn't seem to be human. No sense of humor, and - actually, I think she's an enderman. She just appears behind you.

AAHHH! It's Mrs. Spiders!!!

Mrs. Spiders by Turdmeister69 March 15, 2020

spidertasking 

like multitasking, but with a minimum of 6 tasks going on at any one time.

Man: "oh yeah I'm pretty busy, gets a bit much working on so many things at the same time."
Woman: "oh yeah, women are much better at multitasking than men"
Man: "uh, yeah look, I can multitask with the best of them, but spidertasking is a whole other world entirely."

spidertasking by Hame.ish August 15, 2006

barking tree spiders 

a huge loud ass fart near or around a camp fire.

"damn those barking tree spiders ar really loud tonigt.

barking tree spiders by mronesuit August 12, 2009

Just like a bunch of spiders in a birthday cake 

1. An unpleasant surprise.

2. When a woman hasn't shaven her vagina in months and the guy pulls out and ejaculates on top of her vagina.

"Ahoolah hoolah hoolah, aboolah boolah boolah! Look who's got front row seats to the Mexican hat-dance now, just like a bunch of spiders in a birthday cake!"

"He was surprised at the sight of her unshaven vagina as his ejaculate got stuck in her pubic hair. Just like a bunch of spiders in a birthday cake."

Just like a bunch of spiders in a birthday cake by Dr. Terpentine March 9, 2010

Twin Spiders 

The sparse amount of hair around nipples.

Nothing worse than finding Twin Spiders under the covers.

Twin Spiders by chumfish December 18, 2008

Barking Spiders 

When one is too embarassed to admit that he/she has farted, thus blaming the noise, which closely resembles the noise of flatulence, on barking spiders.

(Man in elevator farts)
Other man: What the hell was that?
Man: I dunno. Damn barking spiders.

Guy 1: Dude I was on a date and totally ripped ass.
Guy 2: Should've just told her it was a barking spider.
Guy 1: Dammit, I didn't even think of it.

Barking Spiders by mollyollyoxenfree July 5, 2010