Absolute Unit 

Someone or something that has the shear mass or presence that makes your jaw drop and/or give the utmost respect to.

Police officer: IT'S A STAND OFF OUT HERE!
Sheriff: Send 'Him' out.
*Absolute Unit steps out of patrol car and everyone takes a knee*
*Suspect immediately turns himself in*

Absolute Unit by Yobbbh August 23, 2018

absolute spoon 

The way of insulting someone. Usually to call them a wanker without them realising

You absolute spoon

absolute spoon by Hayoumug January 14, 2017

Absolute rocket 

Extremely beautiful, stunning, and sexy

That girl over there is an absolute rocket

Absolute rocket by Anus26 June 24, 2019

Absolute Radiance

The hardest boss you will ever face and is the most biggest pain in a 2D game
The requirements are insanely difficult and if you aren’t prepared then have fun going through every boss in the game again but before you can do that you have to do all the pantheons. If your a uncultured swine and don’t know what a pantheon in Hollow Knight is then why are you even reading this, it’s basically a boss rush and that all I’m saying about it. Except that the one you do before the final pantheon is very difficult because a insanely buffed version of the “final boss” of the game is the last boss you fight before unlocking the final pantheon. When you get to the last pantheon you go through every single boss and even the buffed versions of them, right before you fight the Absolute Radiance you fight a boss that is either harder or and hard as her and that boss is Nightmare King Grimm. If you somehow manage to beat him you finally fight Absolute Radiance.

Gamer: “YES FINALLY AFTER A WHOLE MONTH OF TRYING I DID IT, BRING IT ON RADIANCE”
*Absolute Radiance continues to make Gamer to fall in the void, get hit by 2 light pillars, and dies to light sword*
Gamer: “...”
*Throws computer out window*

Absolute Radiance by Absolute Radiance March 6, 2020

Absolute Fuck 

The point where no more fucks can be given.

Dude, I don’t care, I’m at absolute fuck.

Absolute Fuck by MacDaddy31870 February 14, 2019

Absolute Nonexistence 

The absence of existence, the absence of nothingness, and the absence of absence. It is what is not being referred-to under any circumstances. Its definition is that which cannot be referred-to, named, or defined.

The idea of absolute nonexistence contradicts itself.

Absolute Nonexistence by TheNothingness February 15, 2009

absolute shambles 

British slang meaning nonsense, hogwash, etc.

The Leicester City FC soccer player, Jamie Vardy, considered the fact that the team's manager got fired after a loss as absolute shambles.

absolute shambles by Light_Soul March 26, 2017