has me in a chokehold

something or someone that has control over you/your mind

them: isn't this idol pretty?
me: yeah she has me in a chokehold.

has me in a chokehold by starlingkismet August 6, 2023

vietnamese chokehold 

after one has acquired an erection and is desperate to make it unnoticeable, or gone, they put there penis in the Vietnamese chokehold, this is where you take your penis and position it so that is is pointing towards your belly button make it so that the girth of it is firmly restrained by the belt line, making it unnoticeable. the act of doing this can also cut off circulation, difusing the blood quickly. getting rid of the erection quickly and easily.

adam:so the other day in gym class i popped one, do you know what i did
Doug: What could you have done adam? everyone hates gym class randoms.
Adam: well i pulled a Vietnamese chokehold, cured it right up.
Doug: Cool story bro, tell it again sometime!

vietnamese chokehold by doug_nd_adam December 26, 2011

Russian Chokehold 

When you take a mans penis and rap it around his nutsack until it turns blue

Manny gave sal a russian chokehold for eating his cookie

Russian Chokehold by mannysfat March 14, 2010

Poseidon Chokehold 

The act of a man choking a woman between his legs during sexual intercourse while simultaneously ejaculating in to her mouth and creating a "sea" of seamen within.

Dude, I totally gave my girlfriend the Poseidon Chokehold last night and the sea was so deep.

Poseidon Chokehold by justanothervictimoftheghetto April 12, 2010

Shorie Chokehold 

The typical excuse that a male uses when he's unable to attend a male-oriented social function (e.g., poker, drinking, NFL Sunday, etc.). It refers to his girlfriend's/fiancé's/wife's stranglehold on his manhood, leaving him unable to decide for himself when it comes to anything in life.

Bob: Hey, Timmy! You playin' Texas Hold'em tonight with the guys?

Timmy: Sorry, Bob, my wife's got the ol' Shorie Chokehold on my junk. She wants me to be well rested tonight so that I'm totally focused on helping her practice her breathing at our lamaze class tomorrow.

Bob: Damn, Shorie Chokehold's a killer! Well, maybe next week, ya douchebag!

Shorie Chokehold by DCJoey November 10, 2009

Porcelain Chokehold 

When you get a boner while sitting on the toilet and it gets stuck under the seat

"Hey man I've gotta use the bathroom too, would you mind hurrying it up?"
"Sorry man I can't get out, I'm stuck in a Porcelain Chokehold

Porcelain Chokehold by wet_cardboard69 April 18, 2020

Jellyfish in a chokehold 

Holding in a very wet defacation.

dude I'm hold a wicked nasty jellyfish in a chokehold

Jellyfish in a chokehold by Lucky18 January 26, 2011