(Phrase) Used to express extreme disbelief. Usually used after witnessing something exceedingly stupid, or being tasked with something exceedingly difficult. Sometimes also used to express frustration.

Father: Son, can you take out the trash?
Son: No dad sorry I'm working on my KillStreak.
Father: NOW son!
Son: Well fuck ME in the ASS with a CACTUS!

Well fuck me in the ass with a cactus by TheHungryTubist June 15, 2015

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you need a cactus up your ass

maggie needs a cactus up her ass.

One who deserves pain in the gluteus Maximus such as the person (maggie) who needs to be told, you need a cactus up your ass

you need a cactus up your ass by Cactus:) February 11, 2015

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Shut the hell up before I shove a cactus so far up your ass you'll have more pricks in your mouth than your father had on Pride's Month

something that many, many people would like to tell people

"Shut the hell up before I shove a cactus so far up your ass you'll have more pricks in your mouth than your father had on Pride's Month," said little Jimmy "Damn, little Jimmy, you need to chill out," said his bully, getting out the gasoline and matches."

Shut the hell up before I shove a cactus so far up your ass you'll have more pricks in your mouth than your father had on Pride's Month by Earthling hates you March 3, 2021

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asscactus

The conditon in which a man or woman has such prickly ass hair, whether it be from feces or it just grows that way,that said persons ass hair has the sharp prickly quality of the needles of a cactus

1. Dude i haven't wiped in so long i'm starting to develope asscactus.

2. Hey man i was humpin this girl last night and it was all good until I decided to go doggie style and the bitches asscactus was so sharp that it almost pierced my dick.

asscactus by JakeYkins March 9, 2007

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