Customer Service 

A job which causes your ass to bleed like hell, your psyche to be corrupted by severe hatred and psychosis, and which has significantly increased the suicide rate of humans. You always have to take it up the ass by these whiny, bitchy, brain-fucked assholes that are called "customers" who do nothing but scream, complain, and make your life a living hell. Finding an actual intelligent and non-bitchy customer is like selling a pack of Grand Prix cigarettes: it's so fucking rare that it almost never happens.

-"I'm sorry but I do not have enough money to cash this payroll check at the moment."
"What? No, I want a manager, right now."
"Fine, bitch, I'll call a manager for you, but it's not going to change the fact that I don't have enough money in my fucking till."

-"OMG THIS IS THE WORST CUSTOMER SERVICE I HAVE EVER HAD, YOU GUYS DON'T HAVE ANY MORE CHEETOS IN STOCK, THAT'S IT IM NEVER COMING HERE AGAIN, WALMART IS GOING TO DRIVE YOUR ASS OUT OF TOWN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
"Go ahead. I'm a full-time college student working almost a full-time job at minimum wage, sleep-deprived and hardly getting homework done on time. You don't know how few shits I give."

-"I want your number to corporate because these cookies rang up 99 cents more than advertised!!!"

-"OMG THATS IT IM REPORTING YOU GUYS TO THE BBB FOR FALSE ADVERTISING!!!!"
"Cool story bro, want a fucking trophy or something?"

-"I swear, once I graduate and receive my degree, I'm going to kiss all of you asshole customers goodbye for a real job!"

Customer Service by corruptedbyhate April 9, 2013

willy cushion 

AKA penis pillow. That part of the scrotum upon which the member rests its head - between the 2 love eggs. Also that part from which it rises when it awakens.

'Tom. Are you scratching your balls?'

'No. I am plumping up my willy cushion.'

willy cushion by Silly Tilly December 9, 2013

Nexon Customer Service 

Non-existent

Guy 1: So, I was hacked right? So I sent in a ticket to Nexon Customer Service.
Guy 2: What?

Nexon Customer Service by personofwhichwhodoesme December 11, 2011

Chubby Custard 

A still strong, but much less harsh way of calling somebody overweight.

Usually used for banter purposes between friend groups.

John: Hey Alec, can i have a few m&m's?

Alec: You look like you've already had enough John you chubby custard!

John: :(

Chubby Custard by Sidney Shaw October 30, 2012

master of the custodial art

The 'real' name of a janitor.

I am a master of the custodial art.
Or a janitor, if you wanna be a dick about it.

master of the custodial art by PaD May 13, 2005

Customer 

An incredibly stupid person. These people are often found in department and grocery stores and show no signs of common sense. Many times they can be rude, cruel, and obnoxious.

This store has too many horrible customers ruining our job.

Customer by Stanzfield July 25, 2008

Xbox Customer Support 

1: A pain in the ass system for trying to fix a problem but just leads to more shit wrong with your system then before.

2: A secret underground tunnel full of indians (not feather indians, dot head indians), and mexicans that do not know what the hell they are doing and google your question as you ask it.

Guy 1: My xbox sounds like it is fixing to explode because the fan sounds like a helicopter.
Guy 2: Have you called xbox customer support?
Guy 1: Are you fucking high!??!?! I called and they said there should be a slight noise coming from the fan. They can't get it through there head that it is loud enough to wake up my neighbors.

Dude 1: I GOT THE RED RING OF DEATH!!!!
Dude 2: Did you call xbox customer support.
Dude 1: Yeah. They don't know what the fuck they are doing. They said it should be green not red, and I could have swore he was googling porn in the background.

Xbox Customer Support by X CHAZZ X November 29, 2009