banker's hammock 

Created by the tight sweaty stretch of an expensive tailored shirt across a senior banker's sagging belly, providing support to his ageing mass of pale champagne swilling, steak gorging, wine tasting, late night lap-dancing, zero exercise midriff flab. A testament to his lavish lifestyle, his banker's hammock will often be luxuriously paraded around the office, framed between a pair of red braces and will commonly be placed ceremoniously upon his desk as a symbol of his ego and self-importance.

As in: "Look at that fat cat's enormous banker's hammock! He must be a proper big cheese!"

Or: "I better hit the gym - I'm starting to get a banker's hammock and I'm still an analyst!"

Or: "I can smell that man's banker's hammock from here."

banker's hammock by Horndog42 August 5, 2010

hammock status

A conditioned achieved when one is so intoxicated that he or she could at any moment pass out in a hammock in the rain, possibly requiring a search party composed of semi-sober underage persons.

Do you know where Justin is?

He was hammock status about an hour ago. We better check the back yard...

hammock status by Lobster Fest 2009 March 5, 2010

hammock sex 

Two people involved in sexual intercourse in a hammock. (Hammock) chairs are ideal for accomplising this feat for both pleasure and comfort.

The best pleasure I ever had was hammock sex from the honeymoon hammock.

hammock sex by Travs November 19, 2007

hammock snake 

The erect human penis, usually in a sea-going, shortage of females. situation.

Bill's got his cabin door locked, must be chasing the hammock snake again."

hammock snake by mayor of newark September 8, 2008

Golden Hammock Spoon 

A word for when a golden retriever decides to hop into a hammock with you
Or
An imgur upvote

Aww, look at that Golden Hammock Spoon

Dude, just got me a Golden Hammock Spoon

Golden Hammock Spoon by MerMaker June 4, 2018

Salty Hammock 

A tricky sex act whereby a blow job receiver, after copping a saltyload of man love, and prior to swallowing, withdraws the member slowly from their mouth creating a white hanging stream of 'nut goo' between the bottom lip and the 'eye of the storm' resembling a hammock. Those with additional prowess, and controlled suction, can perform the 'retractable hammock' which involved sucking in the spanned length of the hammock at such a speed that it doesn't hit the chin, almost an impossibility.

"Dude you're such a fag, you love giving a salty hammock"

"holy shit man, I met this chick last night and she totally gave me a salty hammock...."

Salty Hammock by Tibby McAwesome August 29, 2012

Shit hammock 

The act of pooing, but instead of plopping into a toilet it gets cradled in your ass hair and just hangs there like a bat in the cave.

"dude What the fuck is that smell"
"oh bro, i got shit hammock'd today its just tragic."

Shit hammock by Nick penutbutter January 27, 2010