catlock 

Verb. A phenomenon that occurs when a housecat decides to sit on or next to a human being, thus immobilizing them out of reluctance to move the soft warm animal from their person.

"I was going to do laundry before Mittens decided to jump in my lap and catlock me."

catlock by Erin Jordan June 14, 2008

catlock 

Verb. A phenomenon that occurs when a housecat decides to sit on or next to a human being, thus immobilizing them out of reluctance to move the soft warm animal from their person.

"I was going to do laundry before Mittens decided to jump in my lap and catlock me."

catlock by Erin Jordan April 5, 2008

Catlock 

When a cat decides to sit on a person's lap, "locking" the person to their seat and hindering that person from moving about to complete chores or errands.
It is virtually impossible to escape or undo the catlock without being a complete asshole to the cat, so the person is usually forced to remain stationary for a long while. The only polite way to remove a catlock is to wait for it to remove itself.

Harold, can you go take out the garbage?"
"Sorry, Hon, but old Tiger just decided to catlock me. Looks like you're gonnahave to go do it."
"Oh, Harold."

"Brad, can you go do the dishes?"
"Sorry, Babe, but old Max just decided to catlock me. Looks like you're gonnahave to go do it."
"Really, Brad...?"

"Rick, can you go get the door?"
"Sorry, Dear, but old Fluffy just decided to catlock me. Looks like you're gonnahave to go do it."
"Goddamnit, Rick."

"Andrew, can you go clean Snowball's litter box?"
"..."
"ANDREW?"
"Fine, fine. The ONE time I need a catlock..."

Catlock by Jon B-C January 25, 2014

Catlock 

When a cat decides to sit on a person's lap, "locking" the person to their seat and hindering that person from moving about to complete chores or errands.

It is virtually impossible to escape or undo the catlock without being a complete asshole to the cat, so the person is usually forced to remain stationary for a long while. The only polite way to remove a catlock is to wait for it to remove itself.

Harold, can you go take out the garbage?"
"Sorry, Hon, but old Tiger just decided to catlock me. Looks like you're gonna

have to go do it."
"Oh, Harold."

"Brad, can you go do the dishes?"
"Sorry, Babe, but old Max just decided to catlock me. Looks like you're gonna

have to go do it."
"Really, Brad...?"

"Rick, can you go get the door?"
"Sorry, Dear, but old Fluffy just decided to catlock me. Looks like you're gonna

have to go do it."
"Goddamnit, Rick."

"Andrew, can you go clean Snowball's litter box?"
"..."
"ANDREW?"
"Fine, fine. The ONE time I need a catlock..."

Catlock by Jon B-C January 25, 2014

catblock 

-ed, -ing
The inability to perform a task because doing so would involve moving a contented cat.

My wife and I wanted to go out for breakfast but Rover had us catblocked.
We were trying to use the laptop, but Mr. McMittens was catblocking.

catblock by Chad Baker December 28, 2007

catblocked 

Being unable to get up from one's resting place to perform acts such as using the restroom, making supper, or answering the front door, because one or more cats are sleeping on your lap.

"John, would you mind getting my phone? I left it upstairs."

"Why can't you get it, Carol?"

"I'm catblocked, you insensitive clod."

catblocked by DentD December 28, 2011

carlocked 

A car that is traped in some way. Double parked or stuck in traffic for example. Comes from land locked land masses.

I would have been here on time but I was carlocked in the parking lot.

carlocked by HybridStorm November 1, 2005