von groovy's definitions

wish like a fat girl

The desperate way of wishing for something that will not happen because the wisher does not have enough self-discipline.

Betty: Oh, Carlene! I really hope that Graham calls me! He's just so dreamy!
Carlene: Betty! Get real! He's from the good part of town. You truly wish like a fat girl!

by von groovy June 9, 2017

Freudian fall

An extreme version of the Freudian slip where the person says or does something that reveals their subconscious feelings so much that they will never be able to be themselves again. This error redefines them.

When Carson asked Asher if he was going into the school dance or if he was just going to hang outside. Asher replied that he'd only go if he could go into the "pants" with him. Asher said it loud enough that Barry heard. Barry posted it and Asher could never pick himself up from that Freudian fall.

by von groovy January 18, 2019

I couldn't stop the swimmers

The simultaneously unfortunate and wonderful feeling that is premature ejaculation

Randy: And then I got in there and it felt soooo sweeet!!
Wally: DUDE!!!
Randy: She looked me in the eye, whispered my name and I couldn't stop the swimmers!!!
Wally: You bitch! Control your jizz!

by von groovy April 13, 2019

Gem among stones

The person who does not behave in a manner that she is of a higher quality than those she is around, but she obviously and truly is. Stones are helpful and valuable, but a gem shines brilliantly and is to be admired and desired.

Everyone had a strong connection with Haylie for she was modest, compassionate, intelligent, and genuine. She was in another class when in comparison to her colleague. She was also breathtakingly gorgeous and did not act as though she were which truly bestowed her the title of a gem among stones.

by von groovy July 29, 2024

with the urgency of an emergency tampon

This is a phrase that indicates a very serious situation that is on a urgent timeline - it needs to be fixed NOW

As Ally jokingly posted a manipulated image of one of her friends appearing fatter than she was on the Gram, she recalled said friend had multiple embarrassing real images of her. So, with the urgency of an emergency tampon, she removed her post and then shared a flattering image of her friend, who was named Abby btw, and tagged it "Bad Bitch!"

by von groovy July 9, 2024

Pre - C

This indicates time before the Corona virus - Pre- C. It was not the best time, but it was much better than the present.

Ashley:" I really wanted to go to spend the night sharing my experiences with my followers! I'm so upset!!!"
Homeless guy: "Shut up!! You're still livin' Pre - C, baby. Those days are over....!!!"

by von groovy March 20, 2020

craft bro

An obnoxious bro who only drinks trendy craft beer and tells everyone about it whether they ask or not

Nate started bartending at a dive near the bus station and a craft bro walked in and bitched that they didn't have the trendy beer of the season. He was out on his ass in seconds.

by von groovy April 8, 2019