the jax's definitions

Devine Offering Position

When a barefoot but clothed girl between ages 11 and 25 with pretty feet and legs puts herself in a non-sexual position, either sitting on the floor or in a chair, where she puts her feet up, bringing her knees to her chest and her heels to her butt, in a way that it looks like she is presenting her feet to another male. Almost 100% of girls who put themelves in this position are doing so to feel comfortable. Most male who have feet and leg fetishes for younger girls called this position by this name and find it arousing.

I was over a friend's house. After dinner we sat on the floor with his family and talked. My friend's younger sister was barefoot and put herself in a Devine Offering Position. She had no idea I was turned on and I wanted to play with her feet so bad!

by The Jax April 19, 2007

Jewishophile

When a non-jewish male of adult age having no knowledge of the jewish religion is aroused and attracted to Jewish adolescent women that are dressed up and wear pantyhose.

I was at the Palisades Center Mall on Sunday and I seen Phil. I said hello and asked him what brought him to the mall today. He said "Well every Sunday the hot jewish teens come out of the woodwork and come to shop at this mall all dressed up because they just came from temple and find that hot". So I said, "Ok well um aren't you almost 30, Phil?". He replied, "I look but don't touch. Then I remember what I see and go home and screw the brains out of my ugly girlfriend with the lights off".

Phil is such a Jewishophile!

by The Jax August 5, 2009

Felony Fuck Friend

an underage Fuck Friend, which may or may not be related, where having consentual sexual intercourse and/or consentual sexual relations with that person is considered a felony by either federal or local law.

I just got home from work and my Felony Fuck Friend called and said she should be home from school shortly. Its not right but what can ya do?

by The Jax April 19, 2007

Neighborly Driveway Toilet

When an individual drinks certain things, like juice, so they have to go to the bathroom to poop. That individual, begins to hold it while waiting in their neighbor's driveway while their neighbor is not home. When the neighbor is coming down the street in their car, the individual drops their pants and squats with their butt facing the street. As the neighbor tries to pull in the driveway, the individual deficates publicly on the driveway in front of the neighbor and whoever else is watching, then pulls up their pants, and walks back to their house, never looking back.

My neighbor has these barking dogs they let out all hours of the night as well as their teenage sons with their loud exausts and boom boxes. I decided use to their driveway as a Neighborly Driveway Toilet and I think they got the point.

by The Jax May 2, 2007

Jenna Fischer Syndrome

When a man gives hints, requests, orders, or complains for women in his home and work life to dress like a secretary, such as Jenna Fischers character on hit TV Show "The Office". The reason for this is for the man to find it attractive yet he is merely a voyeur and it rarely leads to sex.

In some cases it can lead to break ups, seperations, and divorces in home life situations where a wife a girlfriend will continuely not comply with the mans request. In a work environment, it can also lead to sexual harrassment.

My boss at work has made it mandatory that all women in the office dress professionally requiring a professional secretary type clothing. We think he has Jenna Fischer Syndrome as I know he is obsessed with "The Office" and has a picture of her on his wall. This ain't the Micheal Scott Paper Company ya know!

by The Jax April 26, 2009

Golden Toes

When a girl or woman has feet where her bone structure, skin tone, nail placement, and skin texture are so close to perfect that a majority of people who are attracted to female feet will consider her feet more attractive then anything else they ever seen.

A girl I work with is always playing with her shoes under her desk. One day I walked by and she had them off. I couldn't help but stop and look. I could not believe she had Golden Toes. I have never seen feet so beautiful. Some girls have busted feet or they are so-so. But her feet are so amazing.

by The Jax August 5, 2009

Ongoing Payroll Issue

When an individual that works for an employer, who hasn't been fired and is still employed, stops recieving a paycheck due to a payroll screw up. Everytime the individual attempts to follow up on the problem, the person in charge of payroll will call it by that name. Usually, due to the high demands and deadlines in any given payroll department, the probability of the problem being corrected is very low unless a very high level supervisor has become involved. The problem can last for weeks, even months, forcing the individual to get another job or quit all together. Usually getting denied unemployment for quiting. In rare cases, the individual, who quits, will recieve a W-2 form at the end of the year showing all wages, yet a large amount of those wages still have not been paid.

1) I went to pick up my paycheck Friday and my boss did not have it when they came. Payroll was closed and I had to wait till Monday. I called them on Monday and they told me that I should have been paid and that there was an Ongoing Payroll Issue and that it would work itself out shortly. 16 weeks later, I got another job and sued the bastards!

by The Jax May 2, 2007