Definitions by provider44

j-shored 

to feel if as you have lost all brain power and devolved into some sort of primate subhuman hybrid after watching reality television for an extended amount of time.

I collapsed like a lubed up combination ladder in my bedroom after being j-shored by the reality show marathon i could not pull myself away from today.

j-shored by provider44 January 16, 2010

slash

to pull fist into mid torso, like a chicken wing, and strike a person or an animal.

Monzelle kicked his dog like a coward spit at his favorite plant like a whorticulturist and slashed his poor unsuspecting as she baked the violent sleepwalking child his go to cake.

slash by provider44 January 16, 2010

shockets 

any run of the mill bunchback whose ass is quaintly situated eight to fourteen inches below the shoulder...giving that person what one might seemingly refer to as shoulder pockets

'Hey bernard, could you help your sister get her bag out of the high shelf in her closet. Oh and before you do that could you help dad pop his shoulder back into place. Get your hands out of your gorgeous shockets and get over here mister!'

shockets by provider44 January 15, 2010

facebook philosopher 

someone who feels the need to use facebook as a forum to make others think he or she is smarter than them

Brad is the quintessential facebook philosopher. Constantly trying to broadcast his 'brilliance'.

facebook philosopher by provider44 January 15, 2010

poop-paster 

someone whose breath is so nose melting that you would swear that they put poop on their tooth brush.

Rocky's breath was so rotten that even the dog knew he was a poop-paster

poop-paster by provider44 January 15, 2010

mon now 

abridged form of come on now but mon now is full of comical disbelief

Scott: why did you come in late and heavy foot all over the place
Adam:You must have been dreaming that i didn't do that I swear

Scott:Mon now?

mon now by provider44 January 15, 2010

scratch rash

a peson who holds up lines to purchase lottery tickets every day

The scratch rash may have found the remedy for distracting the mind from problems at hand but he is investing in despair.

scratch rash by provider44 January 15, 2010