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paul fleming's definitions

Slut Jockey

A male with a reputation of sleeping with the opposite sex as frequently as he requires. Normally the "slut jockey" isn't particularly fussy about his partner. As the name suggests, he is like a jockey, but instead of a jockey riding 5 horses on a single day (ie. at Aintree), this male may ride up to 5 females. He also stays in character by telling his partner how well they did, and may even give them a pat on the top of their head to show his appreciation of their efforts.
Damien: Look at that guy over there, those girls are
desperate to be fucked by him.
Daryll: Yeah, thats Nigel, he's fucking more girls a day than I get to talk to, he's a Slut Jockey.
Damien: Oh, I see. Lucky Bastard.
by Paul Fleming September 5, 2008
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Slut Doctor

These are doctors that help all females give birth. 9 months after a female has whored around, she will be puished with a small creature that will develope into another human. The person who is paid to help remove the creature from the slut is often reffered to as a "Slut Doctor", because his only aim is to help the slut.
Stacey(pregnant): I'm so nervous, when those guys were waitng in line to have sex with me 9 months ago I never thought that i'd end up in hospital, I'm so scared!
Tracey: Don't be scared babe, the "Slut Doctor" knows what he is doing. He will get that creature out of you in no time!
Stacey: I hope so! I look like an elephant.
by Paul Fleming July 13, 2006
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Insurance Whore

These females are what is known as a God send to any male looking for easy sex. You will find these girls at all nightclubs up and down the UK. They normally never refuse sex and are not the most attractive in their appearance.

If a male has failed in his conquest to find a sex partner for the night, he can always lower his standards and find a "Insurance Whore". Just like car insurance will never let you down, neither will a 'Insurance Whore".
Les: I really came to this club looking for a nice girl to have sex with, but it's getting late and I can't see myself getting lucky now.
Phil: Don't be such a quitter, theres loads of "Insurance Whores" in this place, you just have to lower your standards.
Les: Thanks mate, You always know what to say to cheer me up!
by Paul Fleming July 12, 2006
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Whore Reward

1. Most commonly these things are known as children.
2. After a whore has slept around, These parasites are developed inside a female slut for 9 months before being removed by a Whore Doctor.
3. The most hateful creatures on the planet.
4. An excuse for women not going to work, and an excuse for them to sit around the house all day doing nothing.
Carla: I don't know what to do with my life, I really want to earn a lot of money, but I really can't be bothered to get a job or do any work. What do you think I should do?
Jane: Are you serious? Why not go out and have sex with some guy and get yourself a "Whore Reward"? That will give you an excuse not to work, and you will get money thrown at you by the government, it's like the name says, you are being rewarded for being a whore.
Carla: Thats brilliant, it's almost as though the government understands that lazy woman need to be looked after just like all the other scum in society. Roll on child support cheques!
by Paul Fleming November 9, 2006
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George Bush

A single person who is responsible for thousands of paralysed people suffering due to his stupidity and lack of understanding of stem cell research.
Nigel: I have been in this wheelchair for 4 years now and that idiot "George Bush" has just rejected another plea for stem cells to be used in helping people with spinal cord injuries.
Paul: Maybe someone in his family will get paralysed and he might change his mind.
Nigel: I doubt it, unless he can somehow invade a country in the name of stem cell research, and steal their oil, I doubt it.
by Paul Fleming August 3, 2006
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Brave

This is a word used to describe a person who will risk personal injury and suffering to protect their own beliefs, or to protect another person.
An example of the word "Brave" is a gentleman who has just arrived home to his wife from a night out with lipstick all over him, and stinking of perfume, he then walks over to his wife, slaps her on her ass and says "Whats for dinner then fatty?"
Although some might think this man is out of order, I know no one can question his bravery. A true Hero amoung men.
by Paul Fleming December 18, 2006
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Slut Discount

This is the discount available as a reward for staying faithful to a prostitute. If you frequently visit the same whore, you might be offered a "slut discount" for your loyalty. Very rare, but from time to time it does happen.
Simon: I've been seeing the same prostitute for about 3 months now and last night she said that because I was a regular client, and loyal, I deserved a "slut discount". I now only have to pay £20 for the full works, it used to be £30.
Lee: Thats brilliant, what are you going to do with the money you save?
Simon. Well, its my wife's birthday soon, so I might take her out for a nice meal.
Lee: Your such a romantic, she is lucky to have you.
Simon: Yeah, I know.
by Paul Fleming July 14, 2006
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