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onehandcrabbing's definitions

Fartburger

N. Something that at one point in time would have fetched an excellent market price, but because of seller greed and overpricing it didn't sell and because of market change it suddenly became such a rotten, stinky deal that the item could only be sold below cost.
Jim could have sold his home before the housing market collapse, but he held firm on an astronomical price. Now, he has a real fartburger on his hands.

fartburger.com
by onehandcrabbing November 29, 2011
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fartpad

When you sit on your iPad and crack the screen (in more ways than one) and it makes a muffled fart noise you suddenly have a fartpad.
Hey don't sit on your iPad!
ooops.
Well, nice fartpad.
by onehandcrabbing December 12, 2013
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Fartning

A sudden, unexpected and usually high pitched fart that produces a physical jolt similar to an electric shock. The effect is sometimes felt by those nearby.
I just started giving the speech when I was hit by fartning! Everyone was shocked!
by onehandcrabbing November 14, 2011
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Fartissimo

1. Noun: An extremely loud and powerful fart that commands admiration and deference.

2. Adj: Shockingly loud, commanding - used especially as a description of farts.
The conductor raised his hands as the audience quieted in anticipation and to their profound amazement he unleashed a fartissimo!

Greg made a strong effort and managed a good loud fart, but Jacob's was fartissimo!
by onehandcrabbing November 15, 2011
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Fartification

noun - A well placed or well timed fart that strengthens or defends one's position.
I was going to the kitchen to get another beer, but David's fartification was too formidable.

I asked Robert what he thought about my opinion and his fartification was more poignant than his words.
by onehandcrabbing November 29, 2011
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Romcainey

In presidential politics: to pick a vice presidential candidate who hurts your campaign more than helps it and then then to subsequently sink your campaign completely by making an ill-advised or ridiculous statement in September before the election.

Named for John McCain and Mitt Romney who both achieved the feat.
John McCain vice presidential pick: Sarah Palin. September announcement to suspend his campaign to go back to Washington to work on the financial crisis.

Mitt Romney vice presidential pick: Paul Ryan. September criticism of U.S. embassy while it was then currently under attack and mistakenly accusing the current administration of pandering to terrorists.

Our vice presidential candidate is dragging us down. Let's carefully stay on message this September so we don't commit a Romcainey.
by onehandcrabbing September 13, 2012
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What Does The Fox Say?

Girlfriend: I forgot my toothbrush, so I used yours.
Boyfriend: What does the fox say?
by onehandcrabbing October 27, 2013
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