nicholas d's definitions
Covidiot: “Dude, why are you wearing your mask in the bathroom, are you afraid of…woooooo…COVID?”
Guy: “No, I just don’t want to breathe in the rank-ass sharticles from the huge messy deuce you just dropped”
Guy: “No, I just don’t want to breathe in the rank-ass sharticles from the huge messy deuce you just dropped”
by Nicholas D May 4, 2022
Get the sharticle mug.A pejorative term used by residents of either coast to refer to all US states that do not border an ocean, particularly those in the Midwest.
Person 1: "Where are you from?"
Person 2: "Chicago.
Person 1: "Where the hell is that? Is it a foreign country like Africa or something?"
Person 2: "No, it's in the US."
Person 1: "What state? Probably some lame state like East Dakota or Toronto or Mt. Rushmore."
Person 2: "Illinois actually."
Person 1: "AHAHAHAHAHA LOOOOOOSER! It must suck ass living in the flyover states! Picking corn and milking cows and going to pig shows and shit. Your life sounds terrible."
Person 2: "Yeah...where are you from?"
Person 1: "Stockton, beeotch. Eat that."
Person 2: "Where is that?"
Person 1: "Um, hello, California, duh."
Person 2: "Oh that place. I remember seeing it in a Most Depressing Cities in the US article. Must be awesome sitting in front of your foreclosed mobile home watching Teen Mom reruns on an old black and white TV, wishing you'd catch a break and get cast in the next season, all while trying not to get shot."
Person 1: "Yeah, it is awesome."
Person 2: "Chicago.
Person 1: "Where the hell is that? Is it a foreign country like Africa or something?"
Person 2: "No, it's in the US."
Person 1: "What state? Probably some lame state like East Dakota or Toronto or Mt. Rushmore."
Person 2: "Illinois actually."
Person 1: "AHAHAHAHAHA LOOOOOOSER! It must suck ass living in the flyover states! Picking corn and milking cows and going to pig shows and shit. Your life sounds terrible."
Person 2: "Yeah...where are you from?"
Person 1: "Stockton, beeotch. Eat that."
Person 2: "Where is that?"
Person 1: "Um, hello, California, duh."
Person 2: "Oh that place. I remember seeing it in a Most Depressing Cities in the US article. Must be awesome sitting in front of your foreclosed mobile home watching Teen Mom reruns on an old black and white TV, wishing you'd catch a break and get cast in the next season, all while trying not to get shot."
Person 1: "Yeah, it is awesome."
by Nicholas D February 4, 2012
Get the flyover states mug.A figurative saying meaning that someone is extremely good in the clutch and very cool under pressure.
Norm: "Well folks, we're here on the 18th hole and Tiger Woods is having a great day, putting his balls pretty much wherever he wants to."
Steve: "Yes indeed, he's given a brilliant performance here, Norm. Do you think he's got what it takes to emerge victorious?"
Norm: "Of course, Steve. Tiger is a clutch performer with ice water in the veins. Here he goes to finish up the night."
Steve: "Looking good...oh no! Elin woke up just before he snuck back into bed! She sees the lipstick on his shirt. Uh oh, there she goes looking through his texting history. Oh man, here she comes with the golf club." ***WHACK!***
Norm: "Oooh, great swing mechanics there, but that's got to hurt."
Steve: "Well, that's it folks. Looks like our champ couldn't close it out today, and he could be on injured leave for some time now."
Steve: "Yes indeed, he's given a brilliant performance here, Norm. Do you think he's got what it takes to emerge victorious?"
Norm: "Of course, Steve. Tiger is a clutch performer with ice water in the veins. Here he goes to finish up the night."
Steve: "Looking good...oh no! Elin woke up just before he snuck back into bed! She sees the lipstick on his shirt. Uh oh, there she goes looking through his texting history. Oh man, here she comes with the golf club." ***WHACK!***
Norm: "Oooh, great swing mechanics there, but that's got to hurt."
Steve: "Well, that's it folks. Looks like our champ couldn't close it out today, and he could be on injured leave for some time now."
by Nicholas D April 22, 2011
Get the ice water in the veins mug.A neighborhood in San Francisco bounded roughly by Dolores St. on the east, Diamond Heights Blvd./Market St. on the west, 21st St. on the north, and 30th St. on the south. Lots of shops and restaurants, but not a big nightlife spot since everyone - OK, maybe not everyone, just about 98% of people - have a couple of young kids and a dog. A very yuppie place where people from the Marina neighborhood move to settle down, usually moving on to Marin County when their kids start school. When in Noe Valley, be sure to watch out for the legions of double-wide strollers that will run you over if you're not careful. Pretty much the polar opposite of The Brook in Harrisburg, PA.
Brad: "Well, we're finally moving into our new place in SF! I can't say I love Noe Valley, but at least we're close to some good bars and stuff. I'm at least glad we're still pretty young and not like those boring old yuppies with two kids and a dog."
Jen: "I know, this is great! Here, try this organic, sustainable white truffle sheep's milk barrel aged frozen yogurt."
Brad: "Where'd you get that?"
Jen: "At the farmer's market."
Brad: "Since when do you go to those?"
Jen: "Oh, I just stopped by after my yoga class this morning."
Brad: "Yoga?"
Jen: "Yeah, I just signed up. The fro-yo is yummy, but I wish it were vegan."
Brad: "Ew, vegan, really?"
Jen: "Yeah, we should probably stop eating animal products. Or at least make sure each animal gets at least 100 square feet, eats food prepared by a well-trained chef, and has a personal masseuse."
Brad: "What? Where did this come from? Who are you?"
Jen: "I'm pregnant."
Brad: "Pfft! Seriously?"
Jen: "It's twins. A boy and a girl. I'm thinking we should name them Bentley and Addison."
Brad: "You're kidding, right? Those are names?"
Jen: "Here, check out this stroller site. This double-wide is made by a small local artisan and is only $600."
Brad: "SIX HUNDRED?"
Dog: "Woof!"
Brad: "WTF?"
Jen: "Oh, this is Mr. Woofingtons, the Welsh corgi I just adopted."
Brad: "Mr. Woofingtons?"
Jen: "So, yeah, I'm so excited to live here too! I love this neighborhood!"
Brad: "WHY, NOE VALLEY, WHY???"
Jen: "I know, this is great! Here, try this organic, sustainable white truffle sheep's milk barrel aged frozen yogurt."
Brad: "Where'd you get that?"
Jen: "At the farmer's market."
Brad: "Since when do you go to those?"
Jen: "Oh, I just stopped by after my yoga class this morning."
Brad: "Yoga?"
Jen: "Yeah, I just signed up. The fro-yo is yummy, but I wish it were vegan."
Brad: "Ew, vegan, really?"
Jen: "Yeah, we should probably stop eating animal products. Or at least make sure each animal gets at least 100 square feet, eats food prepared by a well-trained chef, and has a personal masseuse."
Brad: "What? Where did this come from? Who are you?"
Jen: "I'm pregnant."
Brad: "Pfft! Seriously?"
Jen: "It's twins. A boy and a girl. I'm thinking we should name them Bentley and Addison."
Brad: "You're kidding, right? Those are names?"
Jen: "Here, check out this stroller site. This double-wide is made by a small local artisan and is only $600."
Brad: "SIX HUNDRED?"
Dog: "Woof!"
Brad: "WTF?"
Jen: "Oh, this is Mr. Woofingtons, the Welsh corgi I just adopted."
Brad: "Mr. Woofingtons?"
Jen: "So, yeah, I'm so excited to live here too! I love this neighborhood!"
Brad: "WHY, NOE VALLEY, WHY???"
by Nicholas D July 28, 2012
Get the Noe Valley mug.An Apple product that is part human, part centipede, part web browser, and part e-mailing device. Unveiled by Steve Jobs on "South Park" Season 15 Episode 1. Usually made of people who don't read the terms and conditions on iTunes.
Bro: "What's up, Dogg?"
Dogg: "Not too much, Bro. Where's Guy?"
Bro: "Ah, he caught a bad break. He didn't read the terms and conditions when he downloaded Justin Bieber's latest song off iTunes and accidentally agreed to be part of a Human CentiPad."
Dogg: "Ouch, that's a tough break. I've got to say though, he sort of deserves it for listening to The Bieb. That guy blows something awful."
Bro: "Yeah, totally, what a chode."
Dogg: "Not too much, Bro. Where's Guy?"
Bro: "Ah, he caught a bad break. He didn't read the terms and conditions when he downloaded Justin Bieber's latest song off iTunes and accidentally agreed to be part of a Human CentiPad."
Dogg: "Ouch, that's a tough break. I've got to say though, he sort of deserves it for listening to The Bieb. That guy blows something awful."
Bro: "Yeah, totally, what a chode."
by Nicholas D May 21, 2011
Get the Human CentiPad mug.(adj) Pertaining to or characteristic of criminal behavior. Comes from jip, the acronym form of justice-involved person, the new official San Francisco PC term for a convicted felon.
Kid: "Hey dad, I'm heading off to Upgrayedd's house to shoot up hero- I mean study AP Physics. Laters on the menjay!"
Parent: "Ok, sport. I'm happy you found some nicer and more wholesome friends. Your old buddies Poindexter and Eugene always seemed like they were up to no good. Hanging out at the library all the time seemed super jippy. I know kids just go there to smoke drugs."
Kid: "Sure dad, I'll come back after we finish robbing the liq- uh...I mean cramming for that test."
Parent: "Go get 'em, chief."
Parent: "Ok, sport. I'm happy you found some nicer and more wholesome friends. Your old buddies Poindexter and Eugene always seemed like they were up to no good. Hanging out at the library all the time seemed super jippy. I know kids just go there to smoke drugs."
Kid: "Sure dad, I'll come back after we finish robbing the liq- uh...I mean cramming for that test."
Parent: "Go get 'em, chief."
by Nicholas D September 1, 2019
Get the jippy mug.The Hispanic version of an Uncle Tom; a sellout to his people who likes to suck up to the white oppressors.
"Can you believe that punk Marco Gutierrez with his Latinos for Trump group? What a Tio Tomas!"
"Yeah no kidding. What's next, Blacks for David Duke?"
"Yeah no kidding. What's next, Blacks for David Duke?"
by Nicholas D September 5, 2016
Get the Tio Tomas mug.