nicholas d's definitions
A neighborhood in San Francisco bounded roughly by Dolores St. on the east, Diamond Heights Blvd./Market St. on the west, 21st St. on the north, and 30th St. on the south. Lots of shops and restaurants, but not a big nightlife spot since everyone - OK, maybe not everyone, just about 98% of people - have a couple of young kids and a dog. A very yuppie place where people from the Marina neighborhood move to settle down, usually moving on to Marin County when their kids start school. When in Noe Valley, be sure to watch out for the legions of double-wide strollers that will run you over if you're not careful. Pretty much the polar opposite of The Brook in Harrisburg, PA.
Brad: "Well, we're finally moving into our new place in SF! I can't say I love Noe Valley, but at least we're close to some good bars and stuff. I'm at least glad we're still pretty young and not like those boring old yuppies with two kids and a dog."
Jen: "I know, this is great! Here, try this organic, sustainable white truffle sheep's milk barrel aged frozen yogurt."
Brad: "Where'd you get that?"
Jen: "At the farmer's market."
Brad: "Since when do you go to those?"
Jen: "Oh, I just stopped by after my yoga class this morning."
Brad: "Yoga?"
Jen: "Yeah, I just signed up. The fro-yo is yummy, but I wish it were vegan."
Brad: "Ew, vegan, really?"
Jen: "Yeah, we should probably stop eating animal products. Or at least make sure each animal gets at least 100 square feet, eats food prepared by a well-trained chef, and has a personal masseuse."
Brad: "What? Where did this come from? Who are you?"
Jen: "I'm pregnant."
Brad: "Pfft! Seriously?"
Jen: "It's twins. A boy and a girl. I'm thinking we should name them Bentley and Addison."
Brad: "You're kidding, right? Those are names?"
Jen: "Here, check out this stroller site. This double-wide is made by a small local artisan and is only $600."
Brad: "SIX HUNDRED?"
Dog: "Woof!"
Brad: "WTF?"
Jen: "Oh, this is Mr. Woofingtons, the Welsh corgi I just adopted."
Brad: "Mr. Woofingtons?"
Jen: "So, yeah, I'm so excited to live here too! I love this neighborhood!"
Brad: "WHY, NOE VALLEY, WHY???"
Jen: "I know, this is great! Here, try this organic, sustainable white truffle sheep's milk barrel aged frozen yogurt."
Brad: "Where'd you get that?"
Jen: "At the farmer's market."
Brad: "Since when do you go to those?"
Jen: "Oh, I just stopped by after my yoga class this morning."
Brad: "Yoga?"
Jen: "Yeah, I just signed up. The fro-yo is yummy, but I wish it were vegan."
Brad: "Ew, vegan, really?"
Jen: "Yeah, we should probably stop eating animal products. Or at least make sure each animal gets at least 100 square feet, eats food prepared by a well-trained chef, and has a personal masseuse."
Brad: "What? Where did this come from? Who are you?"
Jen: "I'm pregnant."
Brad: "Pfft! Seriously?"
Jen: "It's twins. A boy and a girl. I'm thinking we should name them Bentley and Addison."
Brad: "You're kidding, right? Those are names?"
Jen: "Here, check out this stroller site. This double-wide is made by a small local artisan and is only $600."
Brad: "SIX HUNDRED?"
Dog: "Woof!"
Brad: "WTF?"
Jen: "Oh, this is Mr. Woofingtons, the Welsh corgi I just adopted."
Brad: "Mr. Woofingtons?"
Jen: "So, yeah, I'm so excited to live here too! I love this neighborhood!"
Brad: "WHY, NOE VALLEY, WHY???"
by Nicholas D July 28, 2012
Get the Noe Valleymug. Covidiot: “Dude, why are you wearing your mask in the bathroom, are you afraid of…woooooo…COVID?”
Guy: “No, I just don’t want to breathe in the rank-ass sharticles from the huge messy deuce you just dropped”
Guy: “No, I just don’t want to breathe in the rank-ass sharticles from the huge messy deuce you just dropped”
by Nicholas D May 4, 2022
Get the sharticlemug. Bro 1: “Hey brah wanna come to the Rose Garden party where we celebrate that Supreme Court lady biting the dust?”
Bro 2: “Nah brah that place is gonna be a total rone zone.”
Bro 2: “Nah brah that place is gonna be a total rone zone.”
by Nicholas D October 9, 2020
Get the rone zonemug. The politically correct term for a postal worker. The old offensive term is “mailman” but “mail” is sexist because it sounds like “male” and “man” is obviously sexist to female or non-binary postal workers.
Female postal worker: “I’m here to bring you your 25 annoying unsolicited Capital One offers for the day! Enjoy tossing these straight in the recycling bin.”
Guy: “Thanks! You’re my favorite mailwoman!”
Female postal worker: “Um...excuse me! Did you say MALE woman? I do not identify as male, you sexist pig.”
Guy: “Heavens to Betsy! How could I be so insensitive? I mean you’re my favorite personperson.”
Female postal worker: “That’s much better.”
Guy: “Thanks! You’re my favorite mailwoman!”
Female postal worker: “Um...excuse me! Did you say MALE woman? I do not identify as male, you sexist pig.”
Guy: “Heavens to Betsy! How could I be so insensitive? I mean you’re my favorite personperson.”
Female postal worker: “That’s much better.”
by Nicholas D March 21, 2020
Get the personpersonmug. Mildred: “Heavens to Betsy, Barney, I already took my dentures out and you’ve gone soft on me!”
Barney: "For Pete’s sake, woman, it’s just the old ghostwood again! Let me pop this Viagra and I’ll be rarin’ to go in a jiffy.”
Barney: "For Pete’s sake, woman, it’s just the old ghostwood again! Let me pop this Viagra and I’ll be rarin’ to go in a jiffy.”
by Nicholas D May 2, 2021
Get the ghostwoodmug. The uncooked bread got sick of walking around the bakery with all the other delicious, already-cooked breads, so he decided to bake like a challah and leaven.
by Nicholas D June 6, 2004
Get the bake like a challah and leavenmug. A redneck version of a Jager bomb or car bomb. Involves dropping a shot of Wild Turkey bourbon into Shiner Bock beer.
Judd: "After y'ins had all those turkey bombs last night, Cletus was so hogged up that he passed out in the holler with his face in a cow patty."
Ricky: "Well I'll be darned if that ain't the craziest thing I've heard in a dog's age! Slap your grandma!"
Ricky: "Well I'll be darned if that ain't the craziest thing I've heard in a dog's age! Slap your grandma!"
by Nicholas D March 17, 2009
Get the turkey bombmug.