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natalie portmanteaux's definitions

kustard

Eliza: "I mean, did you ever think--
If you combine ketchup and mustard,
it's called “kustard.” *chuckles*
*laughing* I invented it."
by natalie portmanteaux August 27, 2023
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snow-how

Snow-how, a portmanteau of snow and know-how, is the knowledge and skill utilized during snow and inclement weather.
"Right. So these European settlers, who were total ding-dongs, came in the dead of winter, with zero snow-how. These underprepared vacationers turned to eating each other to survive. Eventually, though, they realized they were surrounded by scores of edible fish and wildlife." ~ Nick Offerman as Beef Tobin
by natalie portmanteaux March 28, 2021
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flagkini

Flagkini, a portmanteau of flag and bikini.
DEAR
GEORGE
WASHINGTON, I
#PREAPOLOGIZE
FOR THE
FLAGKINI.

EQUINOX MADE ME DO IT
by natalie portmanteaux April 24, 2023
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whordiot

A portmanteau of whore and idiot. Coined by Malory Archer in the tv show Archer.
Pam: "Holy shitspace! Hey guys, we got a problem!"
Cheryl: "Duh! The party's starting and this dress makes me look like a whore!"
Malory: "Oh, you don't look like a whore... An idiot, maybe. Or both. Yes, a... whordiot."

Tony: "Your majesty, and you are just, so... What's the word I'm looking for?"
Cheryl: "Don't say whordiot, we hate that."
Tony: "Majestic!"
by natalie portmanteaux May 10, 2021
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chitch

Chitch, a portmanteau of chick and bitch.
Diane: "Sextina, hi. Thanks for meeting me here. I'm really excited to be working with you."
Sextina: "Listen, chitch, if you're going to tweet for Sextina Aquafina, you need to capture the essence of my personal brand, m'kay? All upper caps, no punctuation, lots of cryptic bullshit about the Illuminati, and make sure to mention my preferred brands, okay?"
by natalie portmanteaux June 13, 2021
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bisasual

Danny: "Yep, there's some things you just gotta see. Like those lovebirds over there. Or this guy, pulling off business and casual. Bisasual. Or me about to steal half of this guy's sub."
Guy: "Huh?"
Danny: "You better eat it fast because I'm coming."
by natalie portmanteaux December 17, 2022
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kissper

Kissper, a portmanteau of kiss and whisper.
Tina: "Then they Quantum Leapt into the future to the day of their double wedding with Tina and Jimmy Jr., and they all lived happily ever after. And Sir Bob and Linda were also married, and then they had a baby with a tail because they were cousins. The end."
Gayle: (gasps) "That was so good! Oh, I could feel Scott Bakula's kiss whispers in my mouth!"
Gene: "Kisspers!"
Linda: "Ah, I've heard better. And your father and I are not cousins."
Bob: "That we know of."
by natalie portmanteaux September 23, 2023
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