When a Jew will eat non kosher food when they're out but keeps kosher at home. An act of illogical hypocrisy but is ever so popular among secular Jews.
Dan: Alright Jim what do you want on your pizza?
Jim: Ham and pineapple please.
Dan:No Jim! That's not kosher!
Jim:Dan you don't even keep kosher! I've seen you eat bacon cheeseburgers a dozen times!
Dan:I eat non kosher out but I keep a kosher home!
Jim:That's such bullshit!
Jim: Ham and pineapple please.
Dan:No Jim! That's not kosher!
Jim:Dan you don't even keep kosher! I've seen you eat bacon cheeseburgers a dozen times!
Dan:I eat non kosher out but I keep a kosher home!
Jim:That's such bullshit!
by mrperson123 January 22, 2020
A really gross drink from Starbucks that is also really popular for some reason. It's got tea, coffee, black pepper and cinnamon. How anyone thought that was a good mix is beyond me.
Bob: Hi I'd like to try a chai latte please
Barista: Sure coming up!
*Bob takes a sip*
Bob: Ugh! That's disgusting! People actually pay money for this!? How is this even popular!?
Barista: Sure coming up!
*Bob takes a sip*
Bob: Ugh! That's disgusting! People actually pay money for this!? How is this even popular!?
by mrperson123 August 31, 2017
Jewish Tinder, filled with JAPs and Becks. But unlike Tinder there's unlimited likes and unlike J Date it's free!
Ben: Man I'm sick of getting no matches on Tinder, and my parents keep whining at me to find a Jewish girl, fml.
Sam: Try J Swipe, I've had a bunch of dates from it. But watch out for becks!
Sam: Try J Swipe, I've had a bunch of dates from it. But watch out for becks!
by mrperson123 July 27, 2017
When you're alone on Valentines Day so you basically spend the day fapping to Porn.
Happy Fapentines Day!
Happy Fapentines Day!
Scenario 1
Marko: So Bryan you got any plans for Valentines Day?
Bryan: It's another Fapentines Day for me Bro. Jen text dumped 5 days ago. So my plans are being holed up in my room and fapping away.
Scenario 2
Anne: Hey Alice you manage to find a date for Valentines?
Alice: Sadly no, It's Fapentines Day for me. I've already bought my lube and charged up my vibrator. Gonna scrounge porn hub later.
Marko: So Bryan you got any plans for Valentines Day?
Bryan: It's another Fapentines Day for me Bro. Jen text dumped 5 days ago. So my plans are being holed up in my room and fapping away.
Scenario 2
Anne: Hey Alice you manage to find a date for Valentines?
Alice: Sadly no, It's Fapentines Day for me. I've already bought my lube and charged up my vibrator. Gonna scrounge porn hub later.
by mrperson123 February 14, 2020
Hermione "But Ron that chocolate was mine..."
Ron "Ya better shut ya mouth ya cheeky cunt or I swear to christ I'll hook ya in the gabber m8!
Ron "Ya better shut ya mouth ya cheeky cunt or I swear to christ I'll hook ya in the gabber m8!
by mrperson123 December 13, 2018
A friend who requires a lot of time, attention and money. Kinda like a high maintenance girlfriend but without the perks of sex and intimacy. Said friend is rather clingy and whiney and demands to hangout out frequently.
*Brent's phone rings*
Brent:Hey Matt I'm at work, what's up?
Matt: Come meet me.
Brent: I can't I'm at work.
Matt: So leave early, come buy me a coffee.
Brent: Dude I can't just leave work early, anyway I saw you last night.
Matt:Fine meet me after
Brent: I can't I've already made plans.
Matt:So cancel em and priortise me.
Brent:No man! Look I gotta go
*Brent hangs up*
Coworker:High Maintenance Friend eh?
Brent: Oh you've got no idea.
Brent:Hey Matt I'm at work, what's up?
Matt: Come meet me.
Brent: I can't I'm at work.
Matt: So leave early, come buy me a coffee.
Brent: Dude I can't just leave work early, anyway I saw you last night.
Matt:Fine meet me after
Brent: I can't I've already made plans.
Matt:So cancel em and priortise me.
Brent:No man! Look I gotta go
*Brent hangs up*
Coworker:High Maintenance Friend eh?
Brent: Oh you've got no idea.
by mrperson123 May 07, 2018
Wanking on a plane, usually in the plane lavatory. Like the Mile High Club but far easier to attain and much more shameful.
Example 1
Guy1:Johnny's been in the bathroom awhile, I bet you he's joining the Mile High Club.
Guy 2: Pfft maybe as a half member!
Johnny: Guess who's now a Mile High Club Half Member!
Guy 1: Called it!
Example 2
Drunk guy:Never have I ever joined the Mile High Club!
*Johnny guy drinks*
Johnny:I'm a Mile High Club half member!
Drunk guy: Ew man gross!
Johnny:Hey dude, it was a long flight and I was bored.
Guy1:Johnny's been in the bathroom awhile, I bet you he's joining the Mile High Club.
Guy 2: Pfft maybe as a half member!
Johnny: Guess who's now a Mile High Club Half Member!
Guy 1: Called it!
Example 2
Drunk guy:Never have I ever joined the Mile High Club!
*Johnny guy drinks*
Johnny:I'm a Mile High Club half member!
Drunk guy: Ew man gross!
Johnny:Hey dude, it was a long flight and I was bored.
by mrperson123 January 30, 2018