8 definitions by monkeymoo ✨

a masterpiece, written by Dr. Taylor Swift (aka the music industry) and Liz Rose. released in 2021 on red (taylor’s version), it was originally written in 2011 for the original red album, however was cut down to 5:29. with red (taylor’s version), it was finally released in it’s full glory and poetry.

yes, i wrote this definition so no one has to see the crappy other one
(people singing All Too Well (10 Minute Version) (Taylor’s Version))
FUCK THE PATRIARCHY KEYCHAIN ON THE GROUND, WE WERE ALWAYS SKIPPING TOWN
by monkeymoo ✨ June 4, 2023
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-sigh-

Hey guys, did you know that in terms of male human and female Pokémon breeding, Vaporeon is the most compatible Pokémon for humans? Not only are they in the field egg group, which is mostly comprised of mammals, Vaporeon are an average of 3”03’ tall and 63.9 pounds, this means they’re large enough to be able handle human dicks, and with their impressive Base Stats for HP and access to Acid Armor, you can be rough with one. Due to their mostly water based biology, there’s no doubt in my mind that an aroused Vaporeon would be incredibly wet, so wet that you could easily have sex with one for hours without getting sore. They can also learn the moves Attract, Baby-Doll Eyes, Captivate, Charm, and Tail Whip, along with not having fur to hide nipples, so it’d be incredibly easy for one to get you in the mood. With their abilities Water Absorb and Hydration, they can easily recover from fatigue with enough water. No other Pokémon comes close to this level of compatibility. Also, fun fact, if you pull out enough, you can make your Vaporeon turn white. Vaporeon is literally built for human dick. Ungodly defense stat+high HP pool+Acid Armor means it can take cock all day, all shapes and sizes and still come for more.
person 1: “Hey guys, did you know that in terms of male human and Female Pokémon breeding, Vaporeon is the-“
person 2: -pulls out gun and shoots in the balls-
by monkeymoo ✨ May 1, 2023
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shark plushie from ikea (blahaj = blue shark) that is an icon within the trans/LGBTQIA+ community. is very cuddly and fluffy, and he is love and he is life. yes, i am writing this with my blahaj in my arms :D

common nicknames include shonk, haj, smolhaj (for the smaller varient), and probably many more.
me: “my blahaj only arrived on thursday (feb. 2nd) but he is already the greatest thing ever. he has gone on a car ride buckled in, helped me with homework AND eaten ice, chocolate cake and cheesy rice crackers. i do not need anything else. he is best shonk.”
by monkeymoo ✨ February 5, 2023
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Icy Wyte and Let’s go brandon, i agree’s definitions/their entire existence
Icy Wyte and Let’s go brandon, i agree have mental retardation”
by monkeymoo ✨ March 5, 2023
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-sigh- so lickgate is an “incident” involving twitch streamers Foolish_Gamers and Punz. so one day, foolish goes live and chat immediately starts questioning him about something that punz said on sapnap’s stream earlier. foolish checks the clip. punz said “i licked foolish’s bicep.” and sapnap responds with “someone had a good time at fucking twitch rivals”. foolish acts like nothing happened whatsoever and eventually punz comes into chat spamming “I PLEAD THE 5TH” (the 5th amendment). foolish responds with “YOURE PLEADING THE 5TH NOW? YOURE PLEADING THE 5TH NOW, WELL YOU CERTAINLY WERENT PLEADING THE 5TH EARLIER!” and yeah thats lickgate
“bro did you know that hannahxxrose has footage of lickgate?”
“REALLY????”
“according to her”
by monkeymoo ✨ December 26, 2022
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when someone manages to guess your school locker lock’s code, remove the lock, and put it back on, but backwards. it is a pain in the ass to take the lock off if you’re a victim.
person 1: “did you hear that victoria and caitlin both got butterflied within an hour of each other?”
person 2: “it’s gotta be planned, they’re literally best friends”

(this is a true story)
by monkeymoo ✨ June 15, 2023
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april 6th, 2024, aka the day that fall out boy played 6 MAGIC 8 BALL SONGS during the final show of 2ourdust, THOSE SONGS BEING:

honourable mention (EOWYG), get busy living or get busy dying (FUTCT), the carpal tunnel of love (IOH, this one killed me), rat a tat (w/ carr, SRAR), the kids aren’t alright (AB/AP) and wilson (mania).
the term was coined by FOBcord user from now on we are enemaris/mopeadaz, and the caitlin tunnel of love/m0nkeymoo (AKA me) promised to put it on here.
person 1: “do you remember 8ballmageddon?”
person 2: “don’t remind me, carpal tunnel nearly killed me”
by monkeymoo ✨ April 7, 2024
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