mike2sheds's definitions

vance

Dried semen. An unsightly stain.

After Tommy Vance, UK radio DJ.

by mike2sheds March 7, 2007

bastard

Highly versatile comparative noun. You can be absolutely *anything* as a bastard: as rich as a bastard, as poor as a bastard, as clever as a bastard, as thick as a bastard. It is even possible to be as legitimate as a bastard.

1. "Jeez, what did I drink last night? I was as drunk as a bastard!"

2. "No, officer, I have not been drinking. I'm as sober as a bastard."

by mike2sheds March 25, 2007