mike in aurora, colorado's definitions

Chode Probe

1.) A very specialized method of stimulating not only the prostate, but surrounding items as well, such as muscles, nerves, tissues, blood, and a slew of the same near the anus. It involves either a normally erect penis, finger, medical stimulating electrode, dildo, racketball, or any other item that can apply a fair amount of pressure to the said area: chode; the pubic region between the bottom of the testicles all the way down to the lower edge of the anus. The object of the sexual partner or self gratification: masturbation is to produce either sensations to obtain an erection for the purpose of other forms of sexual pursuits. However, if constant impact of either an erect penis or otherwise is persistent, it may well result in not only a very active center of nerves and sexual organs, but may well achieve an explosive orgasm. 2.) The act of chode probing, or, any act of the same nature as outlined in detail in 1.).

Gay Sex: "No penetration, just a wonderful 'chode probe'!"

Hetrosexual Encounter: "Raul wasn't very excited until I pulled out my largest, life like, dildo and pounded him silly until he came five minutes later. Raul really loves his 'chode probes'!"

Introspective Literary Work: He kept slamming his sister's huge dildo against his 'chode' area for almost an hour. Finally, he pounded heavier and faster than before. As he came, the satisfied man realized that his 'chode probe' had definitely paid off!"

by Mike in Aurora, Colorado February 28, 2008

Bow Wow

1.) Refers to the sex act of doggie style or arf sex, where the male mounts the female from behind, normally vaginal contact, however, can also refer to anal sex in the same fashion. 2.) Having had good sex and boasting about the same, although it is not restricted in the sense of all within definition 1.). Can refer to almost any completed sex act.

Prostitute Query: "I charge the same for 'bow wow' as I would for missionary sex. Would you like that?"

Guy Talk: "We did it 'bow wow' for almost two hours, man!"

False Stud: "Yeah! Got her into 'bow wow' big time! I was good, dude!!" Said Andy, acting proud. However, Howard told Dilbert that it was not true because Sylvia never even saw Andy again. There was no way he could have had 'bow wow' with her, if anything.

by Mike in Aurora, Colorado February 24, 2008

Runk

The Nuevo Modern term (post Twentieth Century) in reference generally towards sex, nomally in context with intercourse, although general variations do follow. It can be the simple definition of sex between a man and a woman, but its application is rather broad without boundaries. It can and is used to describe the mere act of sex, whether straight, bisexual or gay. It is also used to describe feelings of love for someone, or, something. The equivalent of 'fuck' when used in descrptive terms.

1. Sex: "That girl is the type I want to runk!"

2. Alternative sex: "She and I did backdoor runk!"

3. Adjective: "I don't really give a flying runk!"

4. Love: "I really do runk my wife! Seriously!!"

by Mike in Aurora, Colorado January 29, 2008

Noots

Derived from the Comedy Central show, South Park. In a good portion of the episodes, Eric Cartman (a.k.a Cartman), expresses the desire to, "Kick someone square in the nuts!". However, in a strong minority of the episodes mentioned, a distant Southern American accent can be heard. For example, Cartman says, "Ah will kick yew squaw (square) in the noots (nuts)!" Hence, 'noots', is just another word pertaining to the testicles. Also to be used, with punity, in conjuction with the following for direct reference: nuts, balls, beans, nards, nads, double plums, sperm compounds, or any number of other words that relate directly to testicles. Most often used in regards to doing some form of blunt harm to the same.

When Cartman Found Out About A Conspiracy By His Mother To Get Him Infected With Chicken Pox: "Oh, man! I'm going go downstairs and kick her 'squaw in the noots'!"

Bad Drug Deal: "Yo' G! That mother fucker sold me some bad H, man! I'm gonna cut off his noots!!"

Sex and the City Conversation: "He was really into it and got really turned on when I started playing with his 'noots'!"

by Mike in Aurora, Colorado April 10, 2008

Arf Sex

1. A descriptive term referring to the sex act better known as 'doggie style' in where the male mounts a female from behind during the act, much like a canine. 2. In reference to pending sexual encounters that may, well in fact, result in the initiation of 'arf sex', as described in definition 1. 3. To describe what normally women would describe as an indiscretionary male devoid/lacking of morals, ethics and, above all, fidelity. 4. In reference to anything that is promising, however, is most likely negative in future prediction (such as in politics and corporate agendas, the military in Iraq, et al.,.)

Sex: "She and I had 'Arf Sex', and it was good!"

Potential Sex: "When she gets here and a few drinks under her belt, we'll have 'Arf Sex'.

Talking about a Playboy: "He's slick! A real 'Arf Sex' kind of guy."

Politics: "That dude talks a good game, but his track record is real 'Arf Sex'. Nothing he promises ever comes true."

by Mike in Aurora, Colorado February 7, 2008