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michael foolsley's definitions

turd on a roll

"meat" loaded with chemicals (to insure freshness!) sold at convenience store. AKA: shit sandwich (or "sammich") -NOT FINE FRENCH CUISINE!!! ie: catch 'the' cancer here!!
i parked the dump truck and gotted me a turd on a roll and 'ultra' gulp!!

had too much air in my guts, ah needed me a turd on a roll!!
by michael foolsley January 13, 2010
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natty geo

national geographic magazine! -this honored and wondrous magazine was the place i saw my first pair of tits!! -although they were on an african woman, and i had been raised in somewhat of a racist environment, it was not too difficult to imagine them on a white woman!! i was like, damn! whats' the big deal?? -so THATS' a pair of tits!!

natty geo also was in my hands many a time when i'd find myself in some boring environment, ie; visiting friends of my folks, etc.......

i at one time subscribed, but had trouble with their nazi-like subscription policies. i've recently heard they're "hurting" -i hope not!!...-glorious magazine with great articles and WONDERFUL photography!!
found myself at "uncle" mcfoolsley's house bored to tears!, natty geo was my savior!!
seed me a pair of tits in natty geo !!
by michael foolsley February 20, 2010
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clumsy human encounter

a social experience of a LESS than 'gracious' nature, resulting in singular; OR mutual 'stink upon' of each involved human. a situation POSSIBLY terminating in fisticuffs!, DEFINITELY terminating in 'verbal' sparring!!
sam had a clumsy human encounter with the bouncer, who wouldn't believe sam's I.D. was real! sam stomped off, spewing curses at the bouncer.

the mourners had a clumsy human encounter with the westboro church nazis!! -MUCH cursing ensued!!

they crashed in 'all-meat' cars!! -a 'duke-fest' and plenty of cursing, provided a clumsy human encounter!!
by michael foolsley November 14, 2011
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ultra gulp

55-gallon drum of "soda" sold in convenience store, 'tub' of soft drink
hey clyde, pull over! ah need me one o' them ultra gulps!!

gone get me one o' them ultra gulps!

i was lickin' asses n' workin' up a sweat, ah needed me one o' them ultra gulps!!
by michael foolsley December 23, 2009
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dunging bun

wrapping several layers of "terlit" paper around itself to avoid 'soiling' the fingers! the final result looking somewhat like a spinster librarian's hair "bun" on the back of her head !

one CANNOT WIPE a stuck "nugget" , and HOPEFULLY has nitrile or surgical gloves !
i made a dunging bun to avoid touching my "grease release"

i blew a "bad dung", employed a dunging bun , then dunging gloves!
by michael foolsley January 17, 2022
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wunderdung

A.K.A. "wipeless shit"

pronounced 'voonderdung', the miraculous excretion/defecation requiring little, or NO clean-up!!
they were hustling me to get to the meeting, fortunately, i blew a wunderdung!

was hoping for a wonderdung, as i was in a hurry; but ended up with a "mess in my rump"
by michael foolsley September 15, 2014
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messy one

"having" a shit, that creates a MESS in the 'tocks, requiring MANY MINUTES of sanitation (cleaning) work and MILES of "terlit" paper! taking MUCH MORE time to 'clean' than a "wipeless" shit !! the quickest , easiest (and most sensible) fixes are WATER !!
(if NOT on the f**kng JOB!) via shower or bidet (preferred , if outside uncivilized 'merca !!)

if one has the misfortune of walking the rest of the day, too much "residue" has the effect of "whistling" for I.A. (irritated asshole) the 'tocks serving as a 'grinder' , rubbing it in the skin!

always have envied the way it just drops off a dog's "buttle" ! you CAN'T "wipe" a 'nugget' !! ("dingleberry" ? )
let's GO doug !! -going to be a while ! , i just 'blew' a messy one !!
i was late for work , due to "having" a messy one !
i gave 'birth' at work, but it was a messy one !!
by michael foolsley August 3, 2022
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