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michael foolsley's definitions

jersey the toilet

a one finger salute from a marylander who spent five years living in new jersey. nothing (and/or no one) takes more undeserved abuse than new jersey!! -i found many, many, beautiful places and great people!, -very few guidos!! folks were largely really nice to me!! -let me cordially invite those who think jersey is a shit-hole, to go have sex with themselves!!
rolled down RT95 and saw a shit-pit, jersey the toilet!

lets' cut a flop on jersey, yeah! jersey the toilet!

very few things piss me off like people ragging on new

jersey...yeah!, we'll FUCK YOU! jersey the toilet!!
by michael foolsley December 10, 2009
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spooky action

a woman who 'gobs on' the makeup, wears tons of jewelry, thrives on being 'pampered', wouldn't be caught dead going camping, thrift shopping, hates getting dirty, sweaty, exercise, TERRIFIED of NUDITY, WORSHIPS money; -best skills are facilitating release of "man-chowder"!! -thinks own body waste is un-odoriferous! a non-'hippie-chick'; a snob!

-never a 'deep' thinker, having only the most superficial of things to discuss. -most smart men are only able to 'deal' briefly, while getting the 'poison' ground out of them, then VANISH!! (aka: spo-oo-oo-oo-ky action)
john: i think i'd like to 'do' that big flashy blonde! bill: -thats' spooky action!!

thats' some spooky action over in the corner, i told that one babe i was a doctor!, i could smell the 'cave drip'

lets' work those spooks over at table 5, i bet we can get 'into gear' -thats' indeed some spo-oo-oo-oo-ky action!!
by michael foolsley June 28, 2011
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carbide lamp of life

cigarette -the all-important ever-present light/flame that helps them on their way!!
the carbide lamp of life would become tiresome, i'm sure!
by michael foolsley December 23, 2009
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jiggle the handle

shaking toilet handle to re-seat float valve, avoidance of dealing with permanent fix for same. GREAT rock band name!!
i better go jiggle the god damn handle!

tonight me and duane are going to see jiggle the handle
by michael foolsley December 10, 2009
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fight for her arms

female arms being claimed by bulk ! , and beginning to look like tubular balloons (let's make some balloon animals !)
she just gets sloppier and sloppier! , she needs to fight for her arms
by michael foolsley August 30, 2023
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held hostage

wanting sex but being with someone who won't 'put out' until their demands are met, subliminally or otherwise!
jim was fighting with (name) and was being held hostage until her/his demands were met!

she would invariably hold jim hostage until her demands were met!

he hated being held hostage, while the flames were engulfing him!
by michael foolsley January 10, 2010
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launch my paratroopers

jane helped me launch my paratroopers when she 'let me off'!

it was a good old fashioned sperming involving many paratroopers

launch of paratroops means much to the male!
by michael foolsley January 8, 2010
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