apply an oral vacuum

a 'polite' insult from the 'class' of 'polite', verbose insults
won't you apply an oral vacuum to my rectum?

let me cordially invite you to apply an oral vacuum to my crank

couldn't you kindly administer an oral vacuum to my jonk?
by michael foolsley November 23, 2009
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pick up sticks

attract "boner owners" (also a children's game)
you can't look that good and not pick up sticks ! , it's a natural LAW !

she lost 35lbs and was surprised to find herself again able to pick up sticks !
by michael foolsley April 01, 2021
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bubble wrap crack

popping bubble wrap bubbles and unable to stop until all the bubbles are spent. -enjoying the assorted 'crack' sounds as well. supremely addictive!!
that bitch wouldn't stop with the bubble wrap crack...i was about to get my .45!!

whole lot o' goodness wit dat bubble wrap crack!
by michael foolsley February 12, 2010
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'homes'

what realtors sell! -'house' is never spoken in real estate!!

according to bob dylan, "its a house, not a home"

my take is, it isn't a 'home' until a 'family' moves in and makes it one!!
i didn't even know those 'homes' were there!!

lets' go look at these 'homes'!! -you mean houses?? -no!!, i mean 'homes'!!

donna mcfoolsey, realtor; has sold a lot of 'homes'
by michael foolsley February 04, 2010
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domestic artist

a 'housewife', or; domestic 'engineer' -in a world where every birth of the uncommon human is a 'miracle,' a mother would be a domestic artist, or artiste
whatever happened to lauren? she graduated yale, then became a domestic artist, her medium is the male 'effluent' !

jane was schooled in law, but opted for domestic artist, working with the male effluent !
by michael foolsley May 01, 2015
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loadmaster

the female; -a military cargo jet will have a person dedicated to calculating weight loads and space requirements for transportation of heavy, bulky objects. -the materials will be calculated for weight and 'processed' for delivery.

the female serves much the same function, absorbing, incubating, 'processing' and 'delivering' the 'load' of the male.
consequently, upon 'arrival'; more humans are in evidence after final 'journey' of the 'load'!!

some males could qualify as loadmaster too, but for more short length 'hops'!! and much shorter term load 'management'.
joe tag-teamed with that loadmaster, but made sure to slither into his 'propho', first!!

the loadmaster was 'processing' steve's DNA!!

kara favored lapping only, and had no loadmaster inclinations!!
by michael foolsley October 13, 2011
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(-muhammed ali) the easily imagined capabilities of a fine looking woman as regards to sex skills
man, i bet dollars to doughnuts (like that phrase??) that bitch could float like a butterfly, sting like a bee
by michael foolsley November 22, 2009
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