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michael foolsley's definitions

dunging bun

wrapping several layers of "terlit" paper around itself to avoid 'soiling' the fingers! the final result looking somewhat like a spinster librarian's hair "bun" on the back of her head !

one CANNOT WIPE a stuck "nugget" , and HOPEFULLY has nitrile or surgical gloves !
i made a dunging bun to avoid touching my "grease release"

i blew a "bad dung", employed a dunging bun , then dunging gloves!
by michael foolsley January 17, 2022
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messy one

"having" a shit, that creates a MESS in the 'tocks, requiring MANY MINUTES of sanitation (cleaning) work and MILES of "terlit" paper! taking MUCH MORE time to 'clean' than a "wipeless" shit !! the quickest , easiest (and most sensible) fixes are WATER !!
(if NOT on the f**kng JOB!) via shower or bidet (preferred , if outside uncivilized 'merca !!)

if one has the misfortune of walking the rest of the day, too much "residue" has the effect of "whistling" for I.A. (irritated asshole) the 'tocks serving as a 'grinder' , rubbing it in the skin!

always have envied the way it just drops off a dog's "buttle" ! you CAN'T "wipe" a 'nugget' !! ("dingleberry" ? )
let's GO doug !! -going to be a while ! , i just 'blew' a messy one !!
i was late for work , due to "having" a messy one !
i gave 'birth' at work, but it was a messy one !!
by michael foolsley August 3, 2022
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wunderdung

A.K.A. "wipeless shit"

pronounced 'voonderdung', the miraculous excretion/defecation requiring little, or NO clean-up!!
they were hustling me to get to the meeting, fortunately, i blew a wunderdung!

was hoping for a wonderdung, as i was in a hurry; but ended up with a "mess in my rump"
by michael foolsley September 15, 2014
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slabbers

those in the death business...undertakers, funeral homes, or perhaps M.E. pathologist, , e.t.c.

those whose work invariably has a body on a 'slab' !
i've got the reaper stalking me, and the slabbers drooling !
that fentanyl had my buddy with the slabbers
the slabbers are waiting for YOU !

that fat ass T---p , needs to be with the slabbers !
by michael foolsley March 16, 2024
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scary quiet

not hearing expected 'normal' noise from a situation.

NOTHING scares parents more than when they don't hear any noise emanating from wherever their punk offspring are 'playing'. they'll be up in a 'heartbeat' to check, upon hearing too much quiet!!

mysterious lack of usual 'normal' sonic pollution
its' scary quiet today! my townhouse neighbor the heavy metal drummer that drives the over-powered land yacht must not be around!!

it was scary quiet in the jones' play room, the industrial production agent went in to check!

it was scary quiet until the drunken "rednecks" showed up and began loudly pontificating!!
by michael foolsley October 27, 2012
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old fashioned sperming

sport fucking ie: allusion to the days when women served more as property/objects than as a supreme being. needs of man were actually acknowledged, and empathized with.
i could use me an old fashioned sperming

joe was going to get he an old fashioned sperming
by michael foolsley November 30, 2009
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christ's crappin' crotch

expression of frustration and gentle undeification of the deity
christ's crappin' crotch! not published again!
by michael foolsley November 22, 2009
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