matrixbadger's definitions

Brewjob

Having to put one's mouth over the top of a newly-opened beer bottle/can in order to prevent overflow. Looks quite like a clumsy blowjob, hence the name.

My beer started to froth up, so I had to give in and give it a brewjob.

by matrixbadger October 18, 2009

farting cockroach

Slang for moped, used to describe the sound made by a moped and other small vehicles, that seems to sound like a cockroach farting - if indeed cockroaches do fart.

*Chav drives past on moped*
Person 1: Oh look, a farting cockroach

by matrixbadger December 31, 2007

Curb Moment

When everything goes wrong for one day, from the HBO series "Curb Your Enthusiasm" - the adventures of Larry David, where he is constantly getting himself into shit.
When all the problems one inadvertently causes come back to haunt them.

Example 1:
Phil: WTF? You just spilt my pint, you muppet!
Jonathan: Sorry, I'm having a curb moment

Example 2:
*Woman slaps Phil*
Phil: Shit, I'm having a curb moment today. I didn't mean to offend her

by matrixbadger February 19, 2009

Novelling

From the verb "To Novel". This is where you have intercourse with someone (generally a woman using doggy style or a man) whilst reading out extracts from Charles Dickens.

Phil: I indulged in a bit of novelling with Susie last night
Adam: Really!? What's she into?
Phil: It has to be said, the bitch loves "A Tale of Two Cities"

by matrixbadger February 16, 2009

Astrix

Possibly a mis-spelling of Asterix, however it is also the stage name of Avi Shmailov - an Israeli Psytrance artist who reached #18 on the DJ mag "Top 100 DJs" in 2007. He is one of the top Israeli trance artists out there, and his badass music gets any dance floor crowded within seconds.

Adam: Phil, what are you listening to?
Phil: Astrix, it's awesome!

by matrixbadger February 21, 2009

Mr Poostripes

A really smelly, runny shit. Named "Poostripes" because of his messy and diarrhoea-like qualities.

Phil: Holy shit! I just took a messy dump!
Adam: Let's call him Mr Poostripes!

by matrixbadger February 17, 2009

Speech Game

At a function (wedding/formal dinner etc) one person writes a set of predictable words/phrases that could be used in the speech/speeches that are about to be given on a piece of paper, rips the paper up and hands a word/phrase to every person at the table. When such words or phrases are used in the speech, the person with that piece of paper has to drink/down an alcoholic beverage.

This is hilarious if everyone takes part and great for lightening up a dull speech.

Best Man: I'm so glad that you two are going to be so HAPPY together
Person 1: Who's got 'Happy'?
Person 2: Me
Person 1: CONSUME!
*Person 2 drinks*
Person 1: I love the Speech Game!

by matrixbadger July 27, 2009