jim christ's definitions

clown race

1. any race or competition that's more of a comedy than a real test of speed or endurance 2. Homo Sapiens

1. While watching the NASCAR vehicles making left turns all afternoon on TV as well as viewing the weekend freeway action through the window; I realized they were both clown races.
2. Taking into account natural resources, global politics and the lack of unity on planet earth; the inhabitants thereof should be known as the clown race.

by jim christ February 2, 2009

make beliefs

Various pretensions and desperate believings manufactured, brainwashed and clung to in order to compensate for and quell the fear of THE UNKNOWN. Usually take the form of religions and cults.

1. Omar had been brainwashed into the way of the crescent moon prophet from an early age and was firmly entrenched in his make beliefs.

2. When Donna hit bottom in Key West; her anxiety and desperation led her to Jesus and a ready made group of make beliefs.

3. Even though raised Roman Catholic, Madonna gravitated to Caballa and other Judaic nuances to fill a void in her system of make beliefs.

by jim christ April 1, 2009

pansy play

football plays/playbook invented by John "Spot" and Jimmy "Weasel" at Redondo Union High School in the mid 60's which were comprised of quick passes that could not be defended. Probably the original "West Coast Offense" later coined and used in NFL by Bill Walsh and company.

When John and Jimmy started moving the ball downfield with the "pansy play" Larry, Dear Old Dad, Ears, Walter, David, Tyler and others could not defend it!

by jim christ January 28, 2009

Mister November

Nickname for Chase Utley of the Philadelphia "Phillies" who on November 2, 2009 hit his 5th homerun in World Series with New York Yankees to tie previous "Mister October" numbers put up by Reggie Jackson. Chase has either one or two games more to BEAT the RECORD and those damn Yankees, the team of my childhood.

When Chase Utley hit two homeruns in a game for the second time in the 2009 WORLD SERIES between the Phillies and the Yankees (game 1 and game 5); he earned the nickname "Mister November".

by jim christ November 3, 2009

Snoopyville

Another name for Santa Rosa, the home of deceased Charles Schultz and his awesome canine creation who'll live forever known as the one and only Snoopy.

Although Santa Rosa is known as the center of the redwood empire as well as a major hub of northern California wine country; if it's real importance was reflected in its name it would be forever called "Snoopyville".

by jim christ May 29, 2009

rectumectomy

rectum removal either by actual surgery or in a comical sense - by removing an "asshole" from a room, group or other situation.

When Kenny kept making off-color comments and acting the part of a complete asshole, Jimmy Ray decided to remove him from the room and performed a rectumectomy for the good of the group.

by jim christ December 31, 2007

cubism

1.Cubism is a description or label for a period or process of art style pioneered by Pablo Picasso. Picasso broke his images into pieces and changed subjects colors either by choosing hues across the color wheel or those which suited some other artistic purpose necessary to complete his theme. His broken mirror pieces probably were devices which allowed him to put other dimensions (time and space) of each subject matter onto the same canvas in whatever rearrangement suited his whims and compositions needs. In this manner, Pablos renderings actually escaped the limited dimensions of the canvas for all time.

2. The state of being a Cubano or Cubana refugee who has been torn from the old homeland and forced to accept the foibles and exhilerations of the new one.

1. Pablo Picasso broke his subjects into pieces and painted those shards with alternate hues in order to escape the usual dimensions of the painted canvas and formulate the school of cubism.

2. Dulce Maria was an American girl to the max and also had many tell-tale indicators of cubism.

by jim christ April 30, 2009