jake's definitions

Smoking the Sausage

When a person sucks a animals cock.

Laura smoked baily's sausage last night.

by jake August 6, 2004

the sauce

A crazy awsome funky band that some kids from George School started. They lay down some of the the funkiest jams you should check em out.

Chris is the man, when it comes to layin down the funk man, i used to play with that fucker man

by jake January 1, 2005

hot box

the act of farting in a car filled with people, then locking the windows, forcing the people in the car to smell your fart

(while driving, alex farts and locks the window)
Alex: HOT BOX!
Jimmy, Robert and Susan: NO! I CAN'T BREATHE!

by jake May 4, 2006

christmas tree lights

Small, bright, white or multicolored lights on long strands for the purpose of decorating Christmas trees, houses, and plants during the Holiday season.

While they are usually used to decorate Christmas trees, they can be used year-round to decorate back porches, shrubbery, or college dorm rooms.

"Those Christmas tree lights really brighten up your 12'x15' concrete block room"

by Jake February 17, 2005

cocksmoker

(1) a guy who sucks cock

(2) an asshole; somebody who really gets you pissed off

(3) a jerk, a jerkoff

(1) That Alvin is a cocksmoker, he sucked Freddy off in the shower room after the game

(2) Buddy's a cocksmoker, I don't want to see his face this weekend.

(3) He's just a cocksmoker, a total jerkoff, he is.

by Jake February 17, 2004

social security

A pyramid scheme run by the US Government. They promised to take your money to invest it for you so you'd have enough money to retire on, but from the very beginning they've just paid the people who are over 65 with the money sent in by the workers under 65. For any other organization to do this would be illegal. They don't make any real investments at all. They only 'invest' in other government agencies, which means they'll end up being paid back with yet more tax money taken by force from hard working Americans.

Joe Average says "I wanted to invest my money in a private account that I could control in order to plan for my retirement, but after paying tax for Social Security I didn't have enough left over to do that. If Social Security is so great, why do they have to force you to pay for it under threat of prison? If it was really so great, wouldn't people participate voluntarily?"

by Jake August 10, 2004

erectile dysfunction

polite medical term for the condition where you can't maintain an erection sufficient for penetration intercourse to orgasm

I explained that I had erectile dysfunction so she gave me the best blow-job I ever had.

by Jake February 1, 2004