a term once used by barbers to politely ask a customer if they would like to buy a packet of condoms.
Years ago it was illegal for shops to trade on a Sunday and most shops only opened for a few hours on a Sat morning also most local chemists only opened Mon - Fri. Men would often visit the barbers on a Friday evening to tidy them selves up for a date or evening in with the wife etc. the barber would usually offer the condoms as an add on sale at the end, by saying either "Would Sir like anything for the weekend?" or "something for the weekend, Sir?"
by hteb78 September 14, 2013
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To describe a useless object or person.
About as useful as a one legged man in an arse kicking contest...
by hteb78 November 22, 2012
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To describe a someone who gives little or no contribution to a task.
"Jenny didn't help at all, she just stood around like a spare dick in a fucking contest"
by hteb78 April 29, 2013
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Sculpting Water

A term used to describe something that is impossible to do
1) it's like trying to sculpt water.

2) I have more chance of sculpting water then....
by hteb78 November 22, 2012
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Leg of Salmon

A leg of salmon is usually used as a joke in the work place and is generally used to test the gullibility of a new employee. It starts off by the manager or someone of senior authority asking the unsuspecting employee to carry out a personal favour for them. In this case the boss has asked the new employee if he/she minds going to the fish mongers to collect the leg of salmon that the boss had ordered earlier. Wanting to impress his/hers new boss the new employee (not giving a second thought of what he/she has been asked to do) willingly obliges to go on the errand only to be told by the fishmonger (in the tone of 1+1=2) that salmon don't have legs and return back to their place of work (usually to be greeted by hysterical laughter) looking as pink as a salmon.
Boss: "Jimmy"
Jimmy: "Yes Sir."
Boss: "Could I ask a favour?"
Jimmy: "Certainly Sir."
Boss: "The CEO has called a meeting this afternoon and I have ordered a leg of salmon from the fishmongers over the road, please could you collect it for me, as I wont have time after the meeting. All you have to say is "I have come to collect the leg of salmon reserved for Mr Smith".
Jimmy: "Oh yes Sir. I'll do it straight away Sir."
by hteb78 October 19, 2014
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Your best bib and tucker

1) John: "Hey Bill, What's the dress code for the works dinner dance?"

Bill: " Your best bib and tucker mate".

2) " Tommy had is first job interview today, he looked so Handsom all dressed in his best bib and tucker".
by hteb78 August 18, 2017
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A term used in the UK when someone is desperately trying to convince you that their piece of information or version of events is correct to gain your trust but you know that they're blatantly lying through their teeth. Or someone is trying to sell you the latest designer object (watch, trainers, handbag etc.) and you can clearly see it's a fake. It's as genuine as a 40 pence piece. There is no such thing as a 40 pence piece in UK currency so if someone tried to give you one you'd know it wasn't real money.
A woman looking at handbags on Ebay: "oooo have you seen this lovely designer handbag it's only £10"
Friend: " narr mate it's a fake"
Woman: " it looks genuine to me"
Friend: " genuine! It's about as genuine as a 40 pence piece"

Or

A man after been told someone unreliable information: " rubbish! what a load of old tosh"

The informer: " narr mate it's absolutely genuine"
Man: "yeah about as genuine as a 40 pencepiece"
by hteb78 January 24, 2024
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