6 definitions by howlingmadwilger

A solo sex act where a male masturbates in a room full of mirrors (often a hotel bathroom) . The many different viewing angles creates a kaleidoscope effect and can heighten the sexual gratification of narcissistic performer.
JK stood in front of the mirrors in the corner of his Holiday Inn bathroom and had a kaleidowank to pass the time.
by howlingmadwilger May 18, 2014
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When a male masturbates 8 times in a day.
Jamie: During my day off yesterday I was so bored and sexually frustrated I had to pull all the legs off a spider to keep me from molesting my dog.
by howlingmadwilger October 29, 2010
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The act of masturbating adjacent to a window behind net curtains. The performer can see out of the window while the public on the other side are unawares of the sexual act taking place.
Chris curtain twanked in his hotel room receiving sexual gratification from the fact that that the public outside mere feet from him were unaware of his depravity.
by howlingmadwilger June 05, 2015
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Monkeytail beards start at one ear and then wrap around your chin and mouth
Luke: What the heck is that thing on your face!? It looks like you just finished picking the ticks off a monkey's nuts with your teeth.

Wilger: This thing? It's my monkeytail beard!
by howlingmadwilger October 31, 2011
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When one ejaculates on to another person's pubic hair. Alternative: to salad dress.

From the words "VAgina", "JIZz", and "drizZLE".
Nathaniel vajizzled all over Ami's crotch!
by howlingmadwilger August 15, 2008
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