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h.s. willsy's definitions

Water Broading

Sometimes, at a gangbang porno shoot, the blindfolded gangbangee will start to think that they are drowning due to the amount of depraviar that is being fired all over them and they will start to invent and reveal military secrets.
"Er...we've got UAVs hidden under the mountain! WMDs too! We've got goats with heat seeking lasers on their heads!"

"Stop cumming on her guys, she's water broading."

"Sheeeeeeit, that girl crazy."

"Yeah, now just wipe her down and we'll break for lunch."
by H.S. Willsy August 26, 2011
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Razorblade Romance

A form of preversion.

Sometimes a person who is afraid of necrophilia will combat the act by ingesting razorblades in their penetrateables when they are approaching death. Often, when performed, it's also the cause of death.
"Better not be another razorblade romance..."

*SHLUMP*

"Uh oh..."

See preversions and prevert
by H.S. Willsy August 25, 2011
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Preversions

Preversions are acts commited by preverts, i.e. people who preempt the actions of perverts by doing to a pervert what a pervert would have done to them.
"So what preversions do we know of Inspector?"

"Well there's the reverse jackson, the funky trap, the shepherd's delight and the razorblade romance."

"Nasty stuff, nasty stuff."

"Yes. Beware of the prevert perverts, beware!"
by H.S. Willsy August 25, 2011
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Fettlers

A Prestonian word for old men who exist as soon as the pubs are open. They're usually identifiable by their brown, slouched appearance and the musk of cheap tobacco and piss. They may surround themselves with a ring of empty pint glasses as if they were under siege from reality.
"Those fettlers are dying out."

"Yeah?"

"There’s not any less of them, dying out is just their style."
by H.S. Willsy August 25, 2011
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Ket Cramps

Ket cramps (or K cramps) is the name of the abdominal pain suffered by users of ketamine who take 1g + per day for a prolonged period of time
"Oh man, I've got the ket cramps bad."

"Stop taking ket everyday then you filthy scumbag."
by H.S. Willsy August 26, 2011
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Sand Crabbing

Sidling crab-like whilst simultaneously making a high pitched, "w00p w00p w00p w00p," noise.
"Did you see Zoidberg sand crabbing on Futurama last night?"

"No, I had to slay that dragon-witch didn't I."

"Dragon-witch?"

"It's a dragon with the powers of a witch. Or it was anyway. Now it's just 18 tonnes of value to premium grade dog food."
by H.S. Willsy August 27, 2011
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Prevert

A prevert is a person who pre-empts a pervert by doing to the pervert what they would have done to them, e.g. when a ballerina takes an illicit sniff of a foot fetishists loafer or when a child rapes a paedophile
"Mrs. Robinson? Mrs. Robinson? Hi, I'm sorry to have to tell you this but your son Billy molested me last night. Molested me badly."

"Oh my god! Billy did?"

"Yes I'm afraid so."

"Hey, wait a minute, aren't you that paedophile that just moved into the area?"

"Err...yeah...Frank's the name. But I didn't initiate anything, I swear to god."

"Oh that's just mummy's little prevert taking matters into his own hands. I mean, you would have done it to him wouldn't you? Wouldn't you pervert?"

"Yeah...yeah I suppose I would."

"You have to wake up pretty early in the morning to surprise my Billy!"
by H.S. Willsy August 25, 2011
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