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h.s. willsy's definitions

Insane Stunt Bonus Award Committee

The panel of judges that attach a monetary reward to insane stunts performed by reckless vehicleists. Points are rewarded for:

height, length, helicopters taken down, hoes annihilated, hoes impregnated, pimps flattened, homages to Scarface made, police evaded, FBI humiliated, single file rows of, "Gouranga," shouting Hare Krishnas ploughed down, cars exploded, tanks exploded, rescue services exploded and pedestrians splattered.

The committee is currently comprised of Pope Ratzenberger, Kermit the Frog, Tinky Winky, Jerry Bruckheimer and Ringo Starr
"I came off my motorbike the other day and totally splodged a load of old ladies and the Insane Stunt Bonus Award Committee gave me £300!"

"Nice. I only got £30 last week when I accidentally reversed over that penguin."

"You probably wouldn't have got anything if it hadn't have been so endangered."

"Flightless birds are dumb."
by H.S. Willsy August 25, 2011
mugGet the Insane Stunt Bonus Award Committeemug.

UD Wooing

The act of using Urban Dictionary to impress the object of your desire by listing their first name with a definition that's somewhere along the lines of:

X is the most amazing girl in the world, she is really pretty and amazing and she was kind to an animal and when she smile it light up all of the world and she would make anyone fall in love with her because she is amazing and I am lucky to know her and I thank god every day for making such an amazing girl and hope please that she on love with me also.

Almost certainly doesn't get these dweebs the sex they think it will.
"Hey X, have a look at this what I have done for you."

"Err...are you UD wooing me you fucking mong?"

"...no?"

"Die. Die now. Kill yourself while I watch and eat these Doritos."

"Okay..."
by H.S. Willsy August 26, 2011
mugGet the UD Wooingmug.

Sand Crabbing

Sidling crab-like whilst simultaneously making a high pitched, "w00p w00p w00p w00p," noise.
"Did you see Zoidberg sand crabbing on Futurama last night?"

"No, I had to slay that dragon-witch didn't I."

"Dragon-witch?"

"It's a dragon with the powers of a witch. Or it was anyway. Now it's just 18 tonnes of value to premium grade dog food."
by H.S. Willsy August 27, 2011
mugGet the Sand Crabbingmug.

Radio Foured

When someone is completely sober and doing something dull whilst all their friend are out partying, they are radio foured.
"Where were you last night?"

"Radio foured."

"Doing what?"

"I had to go to my girlfriend's grandma's ninety fifth birthday party. What did you get up to?"

"We were snorting comedown-free drugs off naked porn stars for a bit and then we got kebabs."

*SIGHS*
by H.S. Willsy August 26, 2011
mugGet the Radio Fouredmug.

Dim Toning

Setting your favourite song as your ring tone and then, after months of hearing it over and over again through your phone's bass-hating speakers, growing to hate it through too much repetition
"Isn't this your favourite song?"

"No, I can't stand it anymore. I set it as my ring tone and after four months of hearing just the chorus I cracked."

"Gutted. That's some pretty dim toning on your part."

"Yeah."

"What have you got as your ring tone now?"

"Why are we talking about ring tones?"

"We must just be losers."

"Bastard."
by H.S. Willsy August 27, 2011
mugGet the Dim Toningmug.

Shepherd's Delight

A form of preversion.

When a wily sheep dog catches a pervert breaking in and molesting its flock, it may decide to teach the offender a lesson by giving them a brutal doggy raping. The way they do this is by setting up a fake sheep with a mouse trap inside its fake anus. Obviously, the mouse trap catches the perv with his pants down leaving them open to a terrible raping. Which they then get. Doggy style.
"Come here sheepy. AAAAARRRGGGGHHHH!!!!"

"Woof."

"Oh no!!!! Shepherd's delight!"

See preversions and prevert.
by H.S. Willsy August 25, 2011
mugGet the Shepherd's Delightmug.

Preversions

Preversions are acts commited by preverts, i.e. people who preempt the actions of perverts by doing to a pervert what a pervert would have done to them.
"So what preversions do we know of Inspector?"

"Well there's the reverse jackson, the funky trap, the shepherd's delight and the razorblade romance."

"Nasty stuff, nasty stuff."

"Yes. Beware of the prevert perverts, beware!"
by H.S. Willsy August 25, 2011
mugGet the Preversionsmug.

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