frank valente's definitions

funnelcake

to have dry anal sex until the blood acts as a lubricant, then continue the act of anal sex until completion.

yeah i gave mary the ol' funnelcake last night.

by frank valente August 2, 2006

paint the porcelain

when one takes a shit so hard that the piece of shit sticks to the toilet even after multiple flushes.

hey jack, save my seat will ya. i need to go and paint the porcelain.

by frank valente August 5, 2006

valente

in italian it means "valuable"

my last name is valente, i am the valuable one!

by frank valente September 5, 2006

extreme footjob

when one performs the act of a footjob to a male (barefoot & dry) until male comes to completion. then when he ejaculates, use the sperm as a lubricant and proceed to continue giving a footjob until at least 3 or more seperate orgasms have been achieved.

i got an extreme footjob last night by jenny!

by frank valente October 20, 2006

hoodie

a term - to perform oral sex on a male who is uncircumsized

man that girl gave me such good hoodie, she can suck a golf ball through a garden hose!

by frank valente October 22, 2006

helmet

when one gives oral sex to a male who is circumsized.

that girl can give good helmet!

by frank valente October 22, 2006

drive by monkeying

when someone does very loud monkey noises from a moving vehicle to people waiting for buses at bus stops late at night and startling them.

last nite, my buddy and i went drive by monkeying, and we scared the shit out of this old woman waiting for a bus on a bench, it was fuckin hilarious!!!

by frank valente October 22, 2006