frank klaune's definitions

gourd

Slang for the head (the one that rides on your shoulders, that is). See noggin.

Damn, Frank survived that car accident, but he really banged up his gourd.

by Frank Klaune March 29, 2005

chappies

An irritated or inflamed anal area. "The chappies" is a condition somewhat like hemorrhoids but on a more temporary basis. Chappies are usually caused by excessive ass wiping due to having the shits or by excessive moist farts causing a sore, irritated anal region.

"Damn, Frank's food was so greasy I had the shits all day. Now I've got the chappies so bad I can hardly sit down!"

by Frank Klaune March 6, 2004

take a shit

Aside from the relatively obvious use of the phrase (to designate defecation), "take a shit" as a phrase can apply to mechanical devices. An apparatus which wears out or breaks down at a very inconvenient time can be said to "take a shit".

"I told Frank to fix those worn lifters on his car engine but he didn't listen to me. Then when he went on vacation he was crossing the rockies when it took a shit on him. It ruined his vacation."

by Frank Klaune March 6, 2004

farmer snort

Plugging one nostril by placing the index finger on it while blowing out the other one in order to discharge nasal mucus on the ground. The "farmer snort" is a quick, efficient way to blow your nose. Unfortunately, it's also a quick, efficient way to guarantee you won't get a second date either.

Damn, Frank was pretty glued when he was at Mike's house. First he farted out loud, then he did a farmer snort on the living room carpet. Mike dial toned him on the spot.

by Frank Klaune May 1, 2005

funnel cake

To use your dong as the \"funnel\", your baby gravy as the \"cake batter\" and some hot chick\'s stomach area (near her belly button) as the frier. If you\'ve ever watched or made a funnel cake, it is now abundantly clear.

Damn! Frank was so worried about knocking up his girlfriend he pulled out and made a funnel cake!

by Frank Klaune April 26, 2005

sprog

v. Synonyms: cum, ejaculate, blow gravy, spoo.

Damn, Frank has a porn tape where a guy sprogs in some chicks nose like a Vicks nasal inhaler.

by Frank Klaune May 2, 2005

geemer

A cross between "Geek" and "Gomer" (as in "Gomer Pyle", the bumbling army private from the television series of the same name). The term "geemer" was popularized by A.J. "Vakodak" and was also used as a term for the once famous international tennis star, Guiliermo ("Geemer") Vilas.

"Look at that guy with the pocket protector and the highwater pants. God, what a geemer!"

by Frank Klaune March 5, 2004