Urban Dictionary: Definitions by crudmonkey

Profile Monkey

A person who manages the facebook profile of a famous person. They post comments on the celebrity's behalf, and will sometimes speak as if they are the celebrity themselves.

"Omg! Justin Bieber said on facebook that he wants to give a shout out to me omgomgomgomgomgomg!!!!!"

"No, that's his profile monkey who said that. Justin doesn't give a fuck about you"

by crudmonkey November 7, 2016

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squirt the weasel

take a piss. Especially on the female side and when she doesn't shave her vajajay.

Sandrita needed to squirt the weasel because she drank too much Dr. Pepper

by crudmonkey April 25, 2020

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Chinaware

Software that comes from China. Often cheap, full of scammy bugs, subscriptions that are stored on servers in the ghettos of nearby countries, and in some cases, spyware.

TikTok is Chinaware

by crudmonkey December 27, 2024

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A game played by a couple where the chick doesn't shave downstairs, and the object of the game is to tackle her, restrain her, and forcefully shave her nether regions with an electric razor. Both parties are naked while playing this game, and the chick runs around the room trying to avoid the "shepherd."

Mindy is mad at her boyfriend because he played "shear the sheep" with her last night and she lost. Now she's part of the metoo movement.

by crudmonkey June 17, 2018

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jimmy jacking around

Messing around, especially when it comes to a job or important activity. Could also be a reference to beating a dead horse when it comes to getting a machine or important piece of equipment to work.

Steve said that Dave was jimmy jacking around so he got yelled at. Because Dave's a lazy fat nerd and nobody likes him.

Look I'm not going to jimmy jack around with that head gasket, just get an expensive mechanic to do it!

by crudmonkey December 3, 2020

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