crudmonkey's definitions

pavement stone counter

traffic that is so slow and horrendous that you can literally look out the window and count the stones embedded in the freeway pavement.

There was a pavement stone counter on Interstate 80 today because some illegals caused a car accident that flipped a semitruck over and caused 5 other cars to crash.

by crudmonkey May 16, 2022

health prubremiums

What Joe Biden calls healthcare premiums.

Joe Biden said that he plans to save people 2400 dollars a year on their health prubremiums
(Source: State of the Union address 2022)

by crudmonkey March 1, 2022

gaslighting

What those with mental health/perception issues accuse you of doing, when really you are trying to explain your perception of what's going on.

Her: "It's a 6"

Him (Standing on the other side) "It's a 9"

Her: You're gaslighting me!

by crudmonkey October 6, 2021

front hugging

The most censored form of the word "sexual intercourse"

Used by people on youtube to avoid the jewish censors in silicon valley.

Katie from "Without a Crystal Ball" loves to talk about front hugging.

She's mad because she hasn't gotten any front hugging in a while

by crudmonkey March 26, 2021

pokeyman

A derogatory term for Pokemon that will get you your ass beat

Bob to John: Oh look, John has his pokeyman cards hhahahhahahahahahhaha!

*John socks Bob in the jaw, knocking him over*

Bob: MOOOOMMMMMMM!!!!

by crudmonkey February 23, 2021

janey jilling around

The female equivalent of jimmy jacking around. Screwing around when she's supposed to be partaking in an important task.

Amanda was janey jilling around posting pictures of cute nails and taking slutty pictures on instagram when she was supposed to be looking for a job.

by crudmonkey December 3, 2020

jimmy jacking around

Messing around, especially when it comes to a job or important activity. Could also be a reference to beating a dead horse when it comes to getting a machine or important piece of equipment to work.

Steve said that Dave was jimmy jacking around so he got yelled at. Because Dave's a lazy fat nerd and nobody likes him.

Look I'm not going to jimmy jack around with that head gasket, just get an expensive mechanic to do it!

by crudmonkey December 3, 2020