Briggsy Ploughman's

A hearty meal served in gay bars. Usually consists of a lump of mature nob cheese with arse pickle, thickly-sliced bread and pork pie with semen relish. Regional variations can include a rats-cock side dish with diarrhoea drizzle.
Come on Quentin, let's go to The Pink Dildo for a Briggsy Ploughman's. I'm bloody starving after that rimming session.
by Colin Cummerbund September 18, 2006
mugGet the Briggsy Ploughman'smug.

Briggsy's Art Police

Otherwise known as Briggsy's Gay Mafia. A bunch of pretentious artists who punish the non-arty. They march through cities and verbally abuse anyone who dares to walk past an art gallery without going in and jizzing their pants in artistic excitement. Briggsy's Art Police is made up of all the artists who have been anally pleasured by Briggsy and who worship the dwarf as their god.
Better not walk past Tate Modern without going in. Briggsy's Art Police will be patrolling and I don't fancy being harangued by a gaggle of mincing queers.
by Colin Cummerbund September 18, 2006
mugGet the Briggsy's Art Policemug.

Briggsy Brothel

A type of Brothel worked by only the oldest, ugliest and most disease-riddled prostitutes. These women can't do business with regular clients as they are so repulsive no one would pay for them. Instead they are condemned to a Briggsy Brothel where only the oldest, ugliest and most disease-riddled clients go. Regular prostitutes won't do business with these clients as they are so repellant. Thus the Briggsy Brothel matches up hideous hookers with repulsive johns. The BB is such a niche profession that the hookers are frequently idle. These disused prostitutional wastes pass the time by exchanging treasured possessions such as genital warts and fanny slugs.
What's that building the Dwarf's entering?

Aah that'll be a Briggsy Brothel.
by Colin Cummerbund September 08, 2006
mugGet the Briggsy Brothelmug.

Briggsy's Special Lube

Acne pus. Used by pretentious artists as gay-love lube.
Briggsy: Why pay for vaseline when my beautiful face produces copious amounts of Briggsy's Special Lube free of charge?
by Colin Cummerbund October 18, 2006
mugGet the Briggsy's Special Lubemug.
A head-type sported by many civil servants, particularly Natural England employees.
Who's that?

That's Fenton, the new boss.

But he's got a non-regulation head-shape.

Haven't they all?
by Colin Cummerbund September 20, 2006
mugGet the Non-regulation head-shapemug.

Briggsy Does Brighton

A legendary homosexual porno film starring gay artist Briggsy. The movie opens with Briggsy hitching a lift to England's gay capital in a caravan. On arrival he buggers his way through the city's gay clubs. A particularly memorable scene shows the arty dwarf bumming a Portuguese trans-sexual over a bar stool whilst a fruity-looking barman douses him with a soda syphon.
Fruity queen: So Briggsy, what title did you give your film in which you do Brighton? Something really clever?

Briggsy: Of course. I decided to call it "Briggsy Does Brighton"
by Colin Cummerbund December 09, 2006
mugGet the Briggsy Does Brightonmug.

Briggsy jobbie

The turd which is produced after living on crisps, coke and chocolate bars for several days. Its a hideous, grey and sometimes hairy turd which smells so bad it can cause buildings to be evacuated for months.
I've been living off the vending machine at work for a week. I think I'll soon be dropping a Briggsy jobbie.
by Colin Cummerbund September 21, 2006
mugGet the Briggsy jobbiemug.