channel_panel's definitions

telenovela banished

Where all ties are dramatically, definitively and even threateningly cut, leaving the receiving party not only with no hope of reversal or reconciliation, but causing them to question their most basic beliefs about the closeness of the former relationship and their own sense of reality within it.

Often neatly reconciled by audacious deus ex machina.

M: "Hey, is it cool if we talk when you get back from Mexico?"
L: "I guess so...after all, I haven’t telenovela banished you yet"

by channel_panel November 27, 2019

expentials

Expensive essentials. When the price of basics gets too damn high.

Matt: "I just bought a chapstick, superglue, cup of coffee and 3 bananas!"
Cash: "How much did that cost you?"
Matt: "About fifty bucks! Just getting the expentials!"

by channel_panel June 14, 2023

cashin nova

Term referring to an unattractive male who gets attention from ladies because he has money.

Girl 1: "Hey! I got a date with that guy Michael from upstairs!"
Girl 2: "You mean the really ugly one who is about 4'2" and has bad breath and terrible skin?"
Girl 1: "Yeahhh grrrll....he's my lil' cashin nova!"

by channel_panel February 27, 2019

T Paining

T Paining is a verb used to describe what happens, on a Zoom call, when you start to cut out and your voice starts to glitch and stutter, resembling the heavily autotuned vocals of a T Pain song.

Bob: "The metrics for quarter --- zzz -- bzzz -- fzzzz --- "
Employee: "So it looks like Bob is T Paining right now...let's give him a second to reconnect"

by channel_panel September 29, 2020

smartphone punk

Another way of calling a punk a poser, in this case, they aren't hardcore enough to reject the corportacracy's rule and deny themselves the latest iPhone.

Spike: "Dude, this Big Cheese show is full of smartphone punks"
Sid: "Yeah...let's bail and go get some 40's. These kids just don't get it"

by channel_panel November 14, 2020

sniff the nest

A phrase describing when a guy is low-key hitting on a girl. Causally testing the waters to get a feel for the odds of him eventually getting some tail. In this context, 'nest' refers to the female crotch, around which he's sniffing.

Guy: 'Why is your phone buzzing today constantly? Who's texting you?'
Girl: 'This dude I met who offered to teach me how to weld.'
Guy: 'Weld? That's weird. He's probably also trying to sniff the nest'
Girl: 'Yeah, probs

by channel_panel September 23, 2018

luxury ghetto

This term is used to describe places along the lines of unethical safaris in Kenya, certain all-inclusive resorts in India, and fortress-like compounds in areas like Cape Town, etc, which are built directly in the center of impoverished and economically destitute geographic areas. Luxury ghettos are blood-sucking establishments that exist solely for the daillances of the wealthy, while the surrounding land receives little to no economic benefit.

“It’s very important to connect to the community and not to just have luxury ghettos” -- Praveen Moman

by channel_panel January 17, 2023