39 definitions by chang tan

Asian guy who hates his own race, his family, his culture, and especially himself.

He yearns for surgical treatments to change his eyelid shape, and uses dyes to change his skin and hair coloration. Blue eyed pupils and natural blond hair are widely desired, but futile in effort (Dr Mengele experimented with changing pupil coloration by injecting ink with fatal results).

His greatest dream is complete genetic modifcation, cleansing himself of his hereditary curse so that he may produce more children embracing wonderous western customs.

Note that the banana (preferred over the less macho Twinkie), would never touch or own anything Asian. For it he had control of his well-earned money (his family would often shake every cent out of him before he can spend it), he would buy domestic products: American made Hummer H1, Ford/Dodge/Chevy trucks (preferably Cummins/Duramax Diesel engine), and order rectangular pizza over the phone, with the sauces and toppings arranged in a way that it resembles the American flag.
Chang Tan - Western enthusiast, and a figure of anti-Asian traditions.
by chang tan July 11, 2005
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To have your car's engine run with the exhaust manifold bare, rendering it obnoxiously loud, according to rice boy standards.

Your general stock cars are by itself equipped with these items, that guide, muffle, and clean exhaust gases, as well as reduce performance by increasing backpressure:

Exhaust Manifold - A sturdy structure that covers the exit paths after your exhaust gases has left when the exhaust valve opens. It purpose is to collect exhaust gases so it can be either pumped with air to burn undercombusted hydrocarbons (provides no power, but better smog tests) via air injection, or further send down the tailpipe, where further methods are undertaken to quiet and clean the expanding exhaust gases.

Tailpipe - Narrow metal tube, that not only directs the exhaust gases to the back of the car (or to the sides), but because of its small diameter, slows the flow of gases, quieting the motor significantly (an a explosion for example is basically a loud expansion of gases). Slant eyed rice enthusiasts would take the hint, and install gigantic fart cans to their tailpipes to turn their tranquil hum of their civics into a vomit-inducing whine. Like they even need it anyways.

Muffler - As it's name states, it further "muffles" the sound of the still rapidly traveling exhaust gases by forcing it through a series of small intricate pipes.

Catalytic Converters - Helps burn excess uncombusted hydrocarbons that have unfortunately had not be burned up after introducing air into the exhaust manifolds (temperature still hot enough to ignite raw fuel), via air injectors operated by a air pump. Also, it helps get rid of Oxides of Nitrogen (Unuseable, unlike Nitrous Oxide), and changes carbon monoxide into less lethal, carbon dioxide. Catalytic converters reduce performance and sound just as much as mufflers, though if overworked (if your car has rich-fuel problems), it would glow and strain, melting the honeycomb like structures inside, further clogging the path in which exhaust can escape.

A obstructed path for exhaust gases to escape is very bad for engine performance, if nearly completed plugged, exhaust gases have nowhere to go but back into the combustion chamber, causing the motor to run terribly, or stall.

The idea of running your car, preferably a hot rod open header, is to increase performance, lessen the strain on the engine, make it sound louder and more macho, as well as to impress your friends.

Unless your attending a open header contest with other like gearheads, removing any of the above components is ILLEGAL as stated by the DMV. But at least this definition gives you something about exhaust and performance.
"Bling a Ding Chong" thought that by sawing off his catalytic converter on his slick green rice rocket, he can beat Mary Anne on her pink 72 Chevelle. But instead, he serves jailtime with fellow burly prison rapist Tyrone Smith after flipping off a police officer.
by chang tan July 11, 2005
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The deathbed of old people. They check in, they never check out. Before they finally draw their last breath, they are required to live a life of incredible dullness, due to health complications of old folks.
"I'm 60 years old, nothing to do here but to play checkers and eat old corn cobblers, because ham hurts my teeth and bread clogs my arteries."

Heartbeat monitor goes dead...

"Oh dang..."
by chang tan December 30, 2005
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Life draining computer game, players who play it often found themselves devoid of a life, girlfriend, or any other monument of their terrible social abilities.

Gamers ditches school just to spend hours searching of the Ultra Nuklear Oculous of Unanimous Kickass (+2 Skills +3x Immunity to Cold +2000 Magic Damage +Guaranteed Drop of Uniques), rumored to be hidden in a dung sample dropped from Baal's swollen sphinchter.
Diablo 2 Gamer: "OMGz! I just found myself a bitchin' 75x FCR Sorc Ring with 800% Magic Find! God I'm so fucking tired...."

Straight-Thinking Kid: "Neat, I got laid twelve times today. Cool huh? My schlong hurts bad though"

Diablo 2 Gamer: "Haha! You faggot, you got a small dick. Gayass"

Diablo 2 Gamers spasms violently on the floor, blood pouring out of his eyes, then dies from a seizure.
by chang tan March 13, 2005
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A work of art, containing words that eventually may tell us something, moving in a catchy rhythm. Long story short, its "fucking your ears with noises, catchy noises". There are many times of music, starting from quite possibly the very beginning of humanity, or at the least when homo-sapiens stopped picking their noses and stood up, hooting wildly and beating each other in the head with dinosaur bones. This is how music began, don't object me, I know I'm right.

Eventually this "music" evolved into a leisure hobby that has lived to this modern day.

There are many types of music, but apparantly corruption in the RIAA, a money-oinking recording industry began a organized legal-war against the sharing of .mp3s, the main format for music we distribute through websites and gnutella networks. The RIAA's victory against napster proved to be a failure, other file sharing networks sprouted out like mushrooms and cleverly evaded the law by claiming "We arn't distributing the 'illegal files', its the users themselves that choose what they want to distribute, we arn't controlling anything". Nonetheless, recently RIAA and even some governments threatened to sue those who are found to be "pirating" music.

It ain't pirating damnit, all we just do is buy CDs from the mall, use our cd-burner software to extract and convert the music, and hand it out to moneyless bums on the internet. If the RIAA was so damn smart, then maybe they would at least make it harder for us to do so.
Music is basically sounds that you enjoy, unlike the farting your lard-stuffed dad makes.
by chang tan January 2, 2004
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A super-secret technique, executed with precision only by the Admins of Counter-Strike.

Its more of a ban, if you fit a stereotype/demographic/label that the admin does not like, your as they say it, kickbanned.
Player has joined the game

Admin: "OMGz! N00b! BAN!"

Sysop has disconnected Player from the game

Player(1) has joined the game
Player(2) has joined the game
AryanPride has joined the game
WhiteLiekTehMastahRace has joined the game
Shotgunner Sam has joined the game

Admin: "Omgz!"

Sysop has disconnected Player(1) from the game
Sysop has disconnected Player(2) from the game
Sysop has disconnected Shotgunner Sam from the game

TotallyOfTehHizzles! has joined the game

Admin: "Out of my game nigger gay-assed fagg0t!"

Sysop has disconnected TotallyOfTehHizzles! from the game
by chang tan December 21, 2004
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Brief history:
-America goes to war under false accusations against Iraq, Iran, and North Korea. During the judgement day of attack, protesters gather on the streets, its like the watergate incident, people got arrested. Did they get out of jail after the war? We don't know.
I said Dubya sucks, then a patriotic police officer punched me, and now i;m behind bars and nobody remembers me to get me out.
by chang tan October 26, 2003
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