Minion kittens. When an evil being or entity gathers to them dark forces to do their evil bidding, and all they can get are kittens, they've got mittens.
Also; cats who follow their person around everywhere, as though they intend to be helpful, but really just want to sleep near them.
Sorcerer: "Go, my Mittens, and bring me the Dark Crystal of Power!"
or
Lady: I wanted to go get another cup of coffee, but the mittens will just follow me and meow constantly.
Talking to self in a bathroom right before peeing, thinking you're alone, either stream of conscious, or words of encouragement. More likely done and less inhibited when drunk.
Guy: I thought I had some peptalk privacy, but I think my boss heard be talking to my dick.
Girl: Please stop talking to me.
Buy a
peptalk privacy
mug!
When people wear Under Armour, or other athletic gear, everywhere they go, at all times, for no reason, even though they are out of shape or are not working out. Commonly seen in grocery stores or malls.
Another implication is that they have just come from the gym and have not yet cleaned themselves.
Often seen on children of rich parents.
G-Man: Are you on your way to the gym?
D-Man: No, I just bought the new Black Ops game. I'll be inside all day.
G-Man: Well that explains your Over Armour
When an attractive woman or man is the heir to a dynasty, an empire or has a family with a large business and/or is well connected so that they will most likely have a variety of resources both social and financial. A way to say to
I'd hit that, but with a greater level of commitment. They are attractive and rich, but also seem like marriage material. A way to marry into money, opportunities, make connections or achieve fame.
Guy1: "Dude, our waitress is really pretty"
Guy2: "I know, and her parents own the entire chain of these Chinese restaurants.
Guy1: "I'd marry into that."
Buy a
I'd marry into that
mug!
S'mores for the Spring: Take gram crackers, a peep, Easter M&M's and put them in a microwave for 12 seconds. Enjoy!
I have all this crappy Easter candy and don't know what to do with it. I know, Easter s'mores!
Buy a
Easter S'mores
mug!
phrase to add to the end of a sentence in regards to a household appliance to indicate that it has been peed on. Used by a person so drunk, they no longer recognize the proper place to urinate or poop.
Hey man, your DVD player won't flush.
or;
Hey, your clock won't flush.
or;
I was just in the room with the thing over there and your bed won't flush.
or;
I think you need to call someone because I can't get your refrigerator to do the thing and it won't flush.
or;
Man, I'm so drunk I couldn't figure out your Xbox and now it won't flush.
A more modern and less courteous way of saying
Bah humbug. A phrase used to show disdain, disinterest, frustration or general irritation with the holiday season. When you can't stand being around insane crowds, bad drivers, fake cheeriness and stupidly decorated houses any more, just yell it at everyone.
Cratchit: Hey neighbor! Have some Christmas cookies! Merry Christmas!
Scrooge: Your wife's cookies suck, your house looks like the holidays vomited on it, and I don't like your family. Chrismyass.
